Spiky Joe and the Mustache
by Lazlo Buttersworth
Summary: Mario begins a new day, ready for fun and frolic. But, it quickly turns into a big new adventure for him. Join Mario and his new partners on a supposedly humorous adventure through the Mushroom Kingdom, Paper-Style! Updates every Tuesday.
1. Chapter 1: New Adventure

Mario begins a new day, ready for fun and frolic. But, it quickly turns into a big new adventure for him. Join Mario and his new partners on a supposedly humorous adventure through the Mushroom Kingdom, Paper-Style!

_**Episode 1**_

Mario: Ah, another wonderful day!

Mario is sitting peacefully outside his house while Parakarry comes to deliver a letter.

Parakarry: Hey, Mario, this is a letter to Luigi. Probably fan mail.

Mario: Wahzufackleradda! How do you know my name?!

Parakarry: Aw, come on, Mario, a lot of people know you. Now take this to Luigi, please.

Mario: Everyone knows me? What?! WHAT?!?! I must hide my identity!

Mario runs away into his house. Before he goes in, though, he walks back to Parakarry and takes the letter.

Luigi: Hey, Bro. Why do you look so freaked out, huh?

Mario hands over the letter to Luigi then shouts.

Mario: EVERYONE KNOWS WHO I AM!! WACKALAFAHOWHO?!?!

Luigi: Uh... You... Of course, Bro. You're famous... Hey, looks like I'm famous too. Nice.

Mario: But, I can't have everyone knowing me! I must hide my identity!

Mario runs out of the house to find a way to hide his secret identity.

Luigi: Meh... I'm sure he's fine. Ever since he was done with that big adventure through Rogueport, he's been a tad weird. Now...

Luigi takes a look at his letter.

Luigi: Oh, cool! I have a fan club at this place called... The Rare Witch Project Forums? Hm... Never heard of that...

Mario: There! No one will recognize me if I'm wearing this W Emblem badge!

Mario is very confident that everyone will think of him as Wario. While walking back to his home, Mario encounters a Buzzy Beetle with a spiked, red shell.

Buzzy Beetle: Hey, Mario!

Mario: Wah hah hah! I am not Mario! I'm Wardio! Who are'd you?

Buzzy Beetle: Uh... Wardio, huh? Yeah, OK... I don't think anyone's gonna fall for that.

Squin T. walks by and notices Mario.

Squin T. : Oh my gosh! Wario! You really lost weight!

Mario: Wah hah hah! I know, great, huh?

The Toad walks away.

Buzzy Beetle: ... Anyway, I'm Spiky Joe. Remember? From the Glitz Pit?

Mario: Oh, hi! Why are you here?

Spiky Joe: Uh... The...Er, the... Yeah, Miss Jolene let everyone go on vacation, yeah... And I wanted to find some excitement.

Mario: Ah... I was gonna-

Wario then sees Mario dressed as him.

Wario: _**!!!**_

He then walks away from them in shock.

Mario: -go home and sit. Maybe go to the Trouble Center, if I got bored enough.

Spiky Joe: The Trouble Center, huh?

Just then, a Bandit runs by and rams into Mario.

Bandit: Hey, watch it! Can't you see I'm trying to rob someone?! It's hard enough when everyone's looking, but when a random badge wearing doofus is standing in my way, I can't-

Spiky Joe: Hey, you can't rob someone!

Bandit: _**!!**_

The Bandit touches Mario and a curtain covers them. It goes up to reveal a stage with a cheap, cardboard background.

Mario: OK, RPG stuff again!

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario smacks the Bandit with his hammer to do 2 damage.

Spiky Joe/Shell/Shell Shot/ Spiky Joe spins inside his shell and charges at the Bandit for 2 damage.

Bandit/Attack/Thief/ The Bandit charges at Mario. Mario does a Superguard doing 1 damage to the Bandit.

The Bandit became tame!

10 Star Points!

Bandit: Aw... Darn it! Killjoys!

The Bandit runs away, dropping a map.

Squin T. : Aw, thanks you guys! You saved my treasure map! You guys were like super heroes!

Spiky Joe: Hey, I guess we are! Mario, you think we-

Squin T. : That's Mario? I thought he was Wario!

Wario: _**!**_

Spiky Joe: -should fight crime?

Mario: Well, I am bored...

Spiky Joe: Alright! I guess getting kicked off the- I mean, er... Getting a vacation...yeah... was good after all!

Mario: Say, what's on that map?

Squin T. : I don't know... I have no reason for it, so you take it.

Mario: Now we have a mission!

Spiky Joe: But, you need a codename! Hmm... My spike is my trademark... And I say "spiketastic."

Mario: I'll be...

Squin T. : I recognize you by that lip warmer, usually.

Mario: Aha! I'll be Warmer of Lips! I say, "Lip Warming Goodness!"

Spiky Joe: Uh, how 'bout just Mustache?

Just Mustache: Yes, Just Mustache will do great!

Spiky Joe: Uhm... I meant, Mustache.

Mustache: That works too. Yes! Our new mission is to find out what this map is showing! Yes, this adventure will be most Mustache-ical!

Spiky Joe: I heard that this person called Russ knows a lot of things. We should ask him.

Spiky Joe and... Mustache go to Russ T.'s house. Mustache knows the way because he's visited him before.

Mustache: Wait! We need a theme song!

Spiky Joe: Uhm, why?

Mustache: All heroes have theme songs! Hm... Ah! I got one!

Spiky Joe and the Mustache!

Spiky Joe and the Mustache!

Fightin' crime, beatin' baddies up,

Solving Troubles in the Trouble Center!

Spiky Joe, with his Spike Top!

Mustache with his Mustache!

"Look at my Mustache!"

YAHOO!

Spiky Joe: ..............Uh.........Let's just.....continue our mission....

END


	2. Chapter 2: A Cold Start

_**Episode 2**_

Mustache and Spiky Joe enter Russ T.'s house.

Mustache: Hey there, Rusty! How's Dean and Hank goin' huh?

Russ: ...Uh, I'm not Rusty Venture. I'm Russ Toad.

Mustache: Yo, it's called a reference, right swabbeh?

Spiky Joe: Yeah, don't call me swabbeh. So, Russ, are you smart with maps and stuff?

Russ: Why yes! I'm quite map savvy!

Spiky Joe: Map... Savvy? Mustache do you know what that means?

Mustache: Uhm... Smecksy?

Russ: I'm really smart with maps, let me see it.

Mustache hands over the map to Russ.

Russ: Hm... It's a map... that leads to 5 pieces of a machine. That machine looks to be a GBA. It reads that the GBA belonged to a Miles Prower, but was destroyed for some reason.

Mustache: Alright! We're gonna get treasures! What's our first location?

Russ: Hmmm... It doesn't say anything about treasure... But, why do you care? Who are you, Wario?

Mustache: Uh... Wah ha ha! Yes, I am Wardio! Why else am me wearing these dorky clothes?!

Russ: Hrm, yes, well, it seems the locations are numbered, and...The first one is... Shiver City, I believe. Yes, that is it.

Spiky Joe: Hm, Shiver City, huh? Sounds pretty warm to me.

.........

Spiky Joe: It's a joke, people.

Mustache: Hey, I've been there before. I got...accused of murder there...

Spiky Joe: ...And did you?

Mustache: Of course not, the guy fell on his head!

Russ: In order to get there-

Mustache: Hey, yo, wait, woah, hey! I know how to get there. I don't need no instructions to know how to walk to a Shivering City.

Mustache and Spiky Joe exit Russ's house, and come back two seconds later.

Mustache: I'm lost, where's Shiver City?

Russ: There's a pipe leading there in the sewers.

Spiky Joe: The sewers? Augh, I know this won't be any bit of good.

Spiky Joe and Mustache enter the sewers via a warp pipe. They meet some resistance and fight 83 Star Points worth of enemies. But, they eventually arrive at Shiver City...

Spiky Joe: Y-y-y-yep, v-v-very w-w-w-warm here...

Mustache: I felt colder...

Spiky Joe/Item/Spicy Soup/ Spiky Joe gets warmed up!

Spiky Joe: So, where is that GBA Piece?

Mustache: Hm... It's in Shiver City.

Spiky Joe: Yeah, we know that... Where in Shiver City?

Mustache: Somewhere? Uh, let's look in...That house!

The two heroes enter a tall house, which has recently been turned into a milk bar.

Mustache: Oooo, I don't remember this. Hey, how much is a drink, Sir Bar Keep?

Bar Keeper: One cup of milk is- Wait, why am I explaining this? There's a menu up there, see?

The Bar Keeper points at a sign above him. Also, the Bar Keeper is a Bumpty. Yeah, that's kinda important.

Mustache: One shot of a Wolfe Logan Milkshake, please!

Bar Keeper: Ah, of course, sir! These Wolfe Logan ice creams have been getting quite popular lately.............Here you go, sir!

The Bar Keeper slides a mug of a Chocolate and Vanilla milkshake, all swirled around in a fancy S-Curve, topped off with whipped cream and a cherry.

Mustache: Ah, this'll be great!

Mustache slurps down the whole thing and asks for another, then repeats.

Spiky Joe: Uh, wow, hope you don't go to the mOon or anything...

END


	3. Chapter 3: Bumpty Murder Mystery!

This chapter includes alcohol reference, and a drunk Mario.

_**Episode 3**_

Mustache: Heh heh, you there, Spikkie Joena!

Spiky Joe: Uh, yeah?

Mustache: You're...You're-You're-You're-You're kewl...You're the..the one person I will take with me to the mOooOOooOoOOoOnnnah! Or, yeah...

Mustache seems to be drunk. I'm not sure why...?

Mustache: Hey, Dar Keep! Whas in dise milkshake? Mmmmmmm...

Bar Keeper: Uh, well, I put some... special ingredients in it for flavor.

Mustache: You mean ALCOHOL, wah heyhxg... Mmm hmm...

Spiky Joe: Mustache, I think you should stop... I don't want you to go to the mOon.

Mustache: OKaydokay! Let's see Mayor Pongueen... Hm, one more sip.

Mustache takes another sip, and walks out. Surprisingly, his walk seems quite stable. He and Spiky Joe see Mayor Penguin in his house on the west side of town.

Mustache: Hey, I'm want to...darn blasphemy! I'm...going, no... want to talk with Mayor Pengiun, that's right.

Mayor's Wife: Oh, sure, go right ahead. He's in the other room.

The heroes enter the other room.

Mustache: Yes, he would know about suh, GBA Resee Piecie.

Spiky Joe closes the door and Mustache sees the mayor laying on his back, motionless.

Mustache: And oh, great! He's dead! Well, knowing theat...creator person likes to reuse the...the older...ideas, he's probably holding a message.

Mustache walks over and sees a paper in the mayor's hand. It reads, "Herringway."

Mustache: Just like, thele last time. Hm, hoo, wah!

Mayor Dotour walks in.

Mayor Dotour: Hmm... How're things?

Mustache: HEY! This ain't ain't MM! Get the, uh...Smurf... yeah, out! GeeteeeSOh!

Mayor Dotour: Oops, wrong game, huh? Sorry...

Mayor Dotour leaves the room.

Mustache: Yeeee, a joke that...that Koopra made. Yeah, Koopra.... Where am I? Oh, OK... Why's there a penguin on the floor again?

The Mayor's Wife (who's name is unknown) enters the room to check on how things are going.

Mayor's Wife: Is everything OK in here? AH! Why is... You killed my husband! It's... it's... A PENGUIN MURDER MYSTERY_!!!!!!!!!!_

Mustache: Aw, headache... I'm gonna sit in the corner...

Mayor Penguin's leg twitches and gets up, rubbing his head.

Mayor's Wife: Oh, what?! ZOMBEH! AUGH!!!! I CAN'T HAVE A ZOMBEH HUBBEH!!!! WAUGH!!!

Mayor Penguin: Wha-? What are you talking about now? I'm no zombeh. Or a zombie.

Spiky Joe: Say, what happened to you?

Mustache: (softly) Not so loud, please... Headaches worsen with loud...

Mayor Penguin: I was just reaching for-

Just then Herringway enters the room. The rumors in Shiver City spread awfully quickly.

Herringway: What's all this I hear about a Monstar attacking Mayor Penguin with a Shroob of Mystery Novel Murders?

Apparently, rumors change a lot too.

Mayor Penguin: Ah, Herringway, there are no Monstars here. I just fell on my head reaching for another present for you. It's a piece of a machine. Probably a GBA of sorts.

Spiky Joe: _**!**_ A piece of GBA? Me and Mustache are looking for those!

Mayor Penguin: Mustache? Oh, you mean Mario?

Mustache: Aw, how does everyone still know who I am?

Mayor Penguin: An "M" hat, those yellow buttons and that lip warmer. How else?

Mustache: I'll just...ow...Take my badge off, if everyone still knows who I am.

Mustache takes off the W Emblem Badge and puts it in his badge sub folder. Mario's colours revert to their normal, red and blue state.

Mustache: And you might as well call me Mario...Ow, headache...

Spiky Joe: You're still Mustache in my eyes.

Mario: Aw, thanks, Spi-

Mayor Penguin: (Interrupting Mario) Hm, well, OK...I can give you two this instead, is that OK, Herringway?

Herringway: Of course it is... You keep giving me presents everyday. You should stop that.

Mayor Penguin: ...

Mario receives a GBA Piece! He needs 4 more to rebuild that GBA!

Spiky Joe: Alright! Now, can we go? My Spicy Soup is starting to w-wear out.

Mario: OK, I guess so...

Mario slowly leaves with Spiky Joe. When they return to Toad Town, Spiky Joe notices that Mario has something in his pocket.

Spiky Joe: Hey, Mustache, what's that hanging out of your pocket?

Mario: Huh? Oh!

Mario takes out a frying pan. It's Tayce T.'s Frying Pan.

Mario: Uh huh!

Spiky Joe: What?

Mario: Oh!

Spiky Joe: Mustache, are you OK?

Mario: Aw, how come you can't understand my grunts and groans?

Spiky Joe: 'Cause this isn't Stuper Paper Mario. Anyway, the narrator said that pan belongs to Tayce T. Shouldn't you give it back to her?

Mario: Wah! I forgot to give it back to her for all these years! I got this back from the Shy Guys and never gave it back and this yelling is hurting my head again, ow...

Spiky Joe: We should return it right now!

The two heroes quickly head to Tayce T.'s house to return the frying pan.

Mario: Sorry, I'm late, I- Huh?!

Tayce T. wasn't there, though. Someone else was in her place...

TO BE CONTINUED...


	4. Chapter 4: New Acquaintances

**Author's Comments:** I'm adding the new chapter now instead of Tuesday because I won't be on the computer Tuesday.

_**Episode 4**_

Mario and Spiky Joe arrived at Tayce T.'s house. Though, Tayce T. wasn't there, oh no. There was some Koopa instead. The Koopa was clothed in a gray hoodie, with the hood down, revealing long light blond hair. The Koopa was also wearing light blue jeans.

Mario: Uh...Who are you, young lady?

The Koopa: _**!!**_ Uh, sorry to burst your mustachioed bubble, but I'm a guy. :p

Mario: What? But, what's with the long hair?

Spiky Joe: C'mon, Mustache, you know everything's in Technicolour, not gray scale. So, who're you and where's Tayce?

The Koopa: My name's Koopra, I'm an excellent chef, up in Tayce's league! As for Tayce, she moved to a place called Rogueport, to "meat" with another excellent chef. I believe her name's Zess.

Mario: OK, well, Koopra...I have Tayce's frying pan. I was supposed to give it back to her, but forgot.

Koopra: Here, let me take that. Mario, Tayce wanted me to do something for you.

Mario: You know my name, too, huh? Fine, what?

Koopra hits Mario in the head with the frying pan. 8 damage!

Koopra: Tayce said, "That's for not gettin' me my Dan Pan." Sorry, you OK?

Mario: Ow, I have 4 HP left now!

Koopra: Sorry, but she insisted. She said she spent 500 coins for a new one.

Mario: ...

Spiky Joe: ...You OK there, Mustache?

Mario: No, I'm fine, even though I'm missing over half my health.

Spiky Joe: Oh, OK, no trouble then.

Koopra: Well, like I said, I'm an excellent cook, so if you need something cooked up, I'll be here.

Mario and Spiky Joe slowly walk out, after saying, "BYE!" Mario heads straight for the Toad House. When Mario gets inside, he jumps on the bed and sleeps.

Toad House Manager: Uh, go ahead? Take a nap? You could at least talk to me...

Mario: Nighty-night.....ZZzzZZzzz.......I'll get there....ZZzzzZz...To the mOooOn...X-Nauts....ZzzZzzZZZz.....La, Mama's mia....

---------------------------------

Awhile later, Mario wakes up, ready to face any challenge!

Mario: I woke up and I'm ready to face any challenge!

Spiky Joe: Great, let's go see Russ.

Mario: What? I never knew there'd be walking!

Our heroes walk to Russ's house to ask the next location of that GBA Piece.

Russ: Ah, hello, I've found something quite intriguing! It seems that there are three GBA Pieces in Forever Forest! My guess, is that the Boos that live near there must've stolen them for something called, "Lulz."

Spiky Joe: Three in one place? That's easy! No trouble at all!

Russ: Hm, but they're not all in the same place. Some text on the map describes how one is in the forest itself, while another is in the Boo's Mansion, while another is hidden deep underground.

Mario: Underground? Journey to the Center of the Earth, anyone?

Russ: I don't think it'll be like that, but that one piece is described to be "deeper than Articerile's back story."

Articerile: Hey, it's not that deep.

Russ, Spiky Joe, and Mario: O.o You here something? Woah, we're talknig at the same time......... Talknig? Not more blasphemy! Wait, what? ........Don't copy me! Stop it!

Russ: I mean it! D'oh, I'm out...

Spiky Joe and Mario: Just you, huh? Hm...........Bazleflazzle!......Rick Roll? ..........This Fic Contains Win! ......Hey, you know about that, too?.......Stop doing this! I mean it!............Bahah!.........

Spiky Joe: Beezltle! Aw, darn, I lost...

Mario: Yahoo! I win!

Russ: Yes, that was quite fun and all, but you should go now. Remember: Forever Forest.

Mario and Spiky Joe leave Russ's house and start for Forever Forest. But, as they reach Central Town, Mario notices a Golden Hammer Bro.! Mario decides to approach.

Golden Hammer Bro. : Huh? Oh, hi there. How's things?

Mario: You look like quite a rare Hammer Bro. Bowser must've hired you!

Golden Hammer Bro. : Oh, no, Mario. I'm not a part of Bowser's army. I'm a good Hammer Bro.

Mario: You would say that, wouldn't you? Well, I won't buy it!

Golden Hammer Bro. : Please, I'm not trying to pick a fight. I just asked you how things are.

Spiky Joe: Mustache, I think he's telling the truth. He seems too laid-back to be part of Bowser's crew.

Mario: Heh, it's an army, dummy... And if you don't wanna fight, I'll take him on my own! I kill you for being rude!!!

Golden Hammer Bro. : I haven't done anything wrong... Why fight?

Battle!

Golden Hammer Bro. : Please, can't we just talk this over?

Mario: No! You're more evil than Dr. Evil! Yeah, simile!

Can't flee this fight!

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario whacks the Golden Hammer Bro., then does a black flip with confetti! 1 damage!

G. Hammer Bro./Attack/Hammer Throw/ G. Hammer Bro. calmly throws a hammer! 4 damage!

Mario: 11/15 HP 5/5 FP

G. Hammer Bro. : 29/30 HP 10/10 FP

Golden Hammer Bro. : C'mon, I really don't want to hurt you. Let's just stop.

Mario: No, no... Oh!

Mario/Hammer/Power Smash/ Mario uses 2 FP to smash a powerful hit on the enemy! 3 damage!

G. Hammer Bro./Attack/Hammer Barrage/ G. Hammer Bro. throws a series of hammers at his foe! Mario fails to do some Guard Commands! 9 damage!

Mario: 2/15 HP_**!**_ 3/5 FP

G. Hammer Bro. : 26/30 HP 6/10 MFP

Mario: Hoo... Super Mario's hurting... This definitely is _not_ mustache-ical.

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario uses his hammer, but misses the Action Command! For shame Mario... 0 damage!

G. Hammer Bro./Attack/Hammer Throw/ G. Hammer Bro. calmly throws a lone hammer at Mario! 4 damage!

Mario is defeated!

Spiky Joe: Ah! Mustache, are you OK?!

A Life Shroom activates and Mario is revived. Mario: 10/15 HP.

Mario: Oh, no! I was gonna save that shroom for something important! X+B+Start!

Spiky Joe: This isn't a GameCube game.

Mario: Fine, HOME Menu!

Spiky Joe: ...Stop it...

Golden Hammer Bro. : You OK? I didn't mean to beat you that hard...

Mario: Bowser really got tough minions this time around...

Golden Hammer Bro. : I told you before, I'm not in his army.

Mario: Then why didn't you say so?

Golden Hammer Bro. : I did, remember?

Mario: Why are you always so calm?

Golden Hammer Bro. : I'm a laid-back Koopa. It's hard to get me mad. I'm calm almost all the time.

Mario: Ah...Well, that sounds nice... A calm mind is needed to win battles, yea? Well, you can shut your mouth, you Gold Hammer Thing! You're joining my party!

Golden Hammer Bro. : Sure, OK... And my name's Ultramario2.0.

Mario: Hey, I'm Mario! You don't even look close to a 2.0 version of me! "Not even close!"

Ultra: It's just a name. you know? You can call me Ultra.

The Golden Hammer Bro., Ultramario2.0 has joined your party!

Mario: Not this again!

Ultra can use his hammers to attack enemies on the field from a distance! And he's already Ultra ranked, so he has max HP and four attacks to chose from! His best attack is his Hammer Barrage, where he throws multiple hammers consistent with how many times you press A!

Ultra: So, where were you two going?

Spiky Joe: We were heading to Forever Forest to collect three special GBA Pieces.

Mario: There's no time limit, right?

Spiky Joe: No, not that I know of...

Mario: OK, just making sure. Let's pickle! WAIT! I mean, Let's-a go! Yeah...

END

ultramario2.0 is a member of DS Ultimate forums. He is known as the sage of Hammer Bros.!


	5. Chapter 5: Forever Forest Rump

Sorry for the late update, but the site wasn't letting me or other people log on. I apologize for the day lateness.

_**Episode**_...I forgot...Oh, I think it's _**5**_

Mario and co. have just entered Forever Forest. And, even though it was only noon, it became dark as soon as they entered the forest.

Spiky Joe: I heard if you don't follow the right path exactly, you get lost. And I think a monster would pop out of nowhere for- Eep! M-M-Mustache, th-that bush j-just m-m-moved...

Mario: You're just trying to quote Goombario's description. It's, "Boy... This forest is really dark and spooky.

People say that if you don't choose exactly the right paths, you'll get totally lost.

I can believe it. This looks like the type of place where you get lost then monsters come out of the grass and...

Hey! Did you notice that grass over there rustling? I swear I saw it move!"

Spiky Joe: No, really...I-I think th-th-there's something there....

Mario sighs and steps close to the bush that was said to have moved and checks it. Nothing found...

Mario: See? Nothing! Now let's continue, I know the way...

Mario, at first, seems to know where he's going, but Ultra notices that they've been going through the same spot for ten minutes.

Ultra: Hey, Mario, I don't think you know what you're doing.

Mario: It's about time you said something! You people really thought I knew what I was doing?

Ultra and Spiky Joe perform the Facepalm maneuver. (CT)

Mario: Well, I do know that this way is right, because I saw a Shy Guy go through there.

Ultra: Then let's follow him, he might know where he's going.

Mario quickly goes through the level exit the Shy Guy went through, to find a different type of Forever Forest scenery. He stops as he sees the Shy Guy talking to a smiling flower. Yeah...

Shy Guy: No, no.......Oh, really? .......Hm? .......No, he's going solo right now. It's not that great, really, it was better when he was with the others, ya know? .......Eheh! I know, right?

Mario: What are you doing?

Shy Guy: Wha! Oh oh oh, you scared me, there. I was just talking with Dia Mei.

Mario: ...What are you, some sort of nature speaker?

Shy Guy: Yeah...

Mario: C00l! Say, you know your way around here?

Shy Guy: Nope... I have to ask the plants and animals here how to get through...

Mario: Why are you going through the Forest?

Shy Guy: Merlon said that I can help a great hero stop a cataclysm if I go into the Forever Forest and look for a piece of a magical GBA.

Mario: Really? That's nice. Well, later...

Spiky Joe: _WOAH_, hold it! We're looking for the GBA Pieces! Mustache, you completely forget or what?

Mario: Of course I didn't forget... But, he's not searching for a "GBA Piece." He's searching for a "Piece of GBA..." Duh...

Ultra: Not a smart cookie?

Spiky Joe: Nope...It just takes him awhile to roll...

Mario: WAHNABLAKOOBOONACKA!! We're looking for GBA Pieces! Shy Guy, can you help us?

Shy Guy: Sure! And call me Sonny.

Mario: Well, I don't got the money, Sonny...

Sonny: I don't think anyone knows what that's from... (It's from GTA)

Mario: Their loss... So, which way, Sonny?

Sonny: Hold on....Dia Mei, thanks.....Where is it, again? ...........Thanks again......It's over there, guys!

Sonny leads Mario and his party through the Forever Forest. Sonny befriends all the plants and animals he sees and asks them the way to go. After awhile, they arrive at a hill located in the forest.

Sonny: Hm, there used to be a badge in that block...

Mario: Yeah, I took it...There was an FP Plus in it.

Sonny: Ah...Well, according to the plants and animals, the first GBA Piece should be here. But, I don't see anything...

Spiky Joe: (slowly) That bush just moved....

Mario: Fine, I'll check it again...

The bush contains nothing...

Mario: Once again, nothing's there...

Spiky Joe: (slowly) No....Not that one... That big black bush, there...

Mario: Oh, that? That's just a wolf, he won't hurt anyone...

Spiky Joe: (terrified) W-W-What?!

Mario: (slowly) W-O-L-F Wolf...It's a dog... Mama mia, are you really that dumb?

Sonny: Wolves aren't dogs... They're Lupines...

Spiky Joe: .........

Mario: I can make dots too.....................

Sonny: .......................

Ultra: .......................

Mario: ......................

wolf: ........................

Spiky Joe: ............................

jim: ..........................

Mario: ...............................

Ultra: .........................

Sonny: ................................

Ultra: Can we stop this now? It really doesn't make sense...I mean, who's jim?

Sonny: I'm sure the wolf is nice...Let me talk to him...

Sonny talks with the wolf. Spiky Joe is paralyzed with fear. Mario is.....picking his nose... Ultra is rolling his eyes because Mario is picking his nose.

Sonny: You seem to like people, huh? Well, thanks! ......Alright, gang, we got GBA Piece #1!

Mario: What?

Sonny: ............That's disgusting, stop it, Mario...No one wants to see the gold you have in your nostril caverns.

Mario: ..............Fine...Alrighty...

Mario wipes his "gold" on Spiky Joe. Mario receives his second GBA Piece! There are two more in this area.

Sonny: Endrole said that there's another GBA Piece in Boo's Mansion.

Ultra: Huh? Endrole? Who's that?

Sonny: The wolf that gave us the GBA Piece, who else?

Ultra: Oh, right... So, Boo's Manson isn't too far from here... We should be on the right track.

Sonny continues to lead Mario and friends through Forever Forest. They shortly reach Boo's Mansion, which is a mansion ruled by Boos. Duh...

Mario: So, Spike, can you handle Boos? Or do I have to carry you again?

Spiky Joe: Don't call me Spike...And yes, I'm fine with Boos. 'Cause I know what to expect.

Mario and party enter Boo's Mansion to find the next GBA Piece. Though, there seems to be no Boos inside. Mario decides to shout into the emptyness.

Mario: Hey, we're looking for a GBA Piece! You guys see any?

No response...

Mario: ........................

Sonny: ....................

dmoss: ..............Why am I here?

Spiky Joe: Not this dot thing again! Really, is anyone here?

A painting of a GBA twitches. Spiky Joe yawns. Ultra patiently waits for his next line. Sonny doubts he'll be of any more help. Mario thinks. Wait, what? He never thinks! What's he thinking about?

Mario: I think paintings of GBA's aren't supposed to twitch...

Mario runs up the stairs and looks at the painting.

Mario: Hm, or that painting...

Spiky Joe: Huh? Two paintings?

Mario: Actually, three. But, it's the one in the middle.

Mario reaches into the middle painting and takes out a lion. He quickly puts the lion back into the painting.

Mario: Whoop, wrong one...

Rocky: And now here's something we'll really hope you'll enjoy.

Mario: Hey, hey, we're still doing this! It's the left painting!

Mario reaches into the left most painting and takes out a GBA Piece! That's the 3rd one! There's one more buried underneath Gusty Gulch.

Spiky Joe: Underneath Gusty Gulch? Did I hear that right? I still don't get how we're gonna find that one.

Ultra: How deep underground is it?

Mario: Russ said that it's "deeper than Articerile's back story."

Articerile: I told you, it's not that deep!

Mario: .....................

Ultra: ......................

Articerile: ...........................

Ultra: .....................Who's Articerile?

Mario: I dunno.............Chef?

Articerile: ..........................

Mario, Spiky Joe, and Ultra exit the Boo mansion. They say their Good-bye's to Sonny, and continue on their way to Gusty Gulch.

END


	6. Chapter 6: Angry Incident

A tad bit of warning: Some minor swears in this one.

_**Episode**_ 256...I mean 6, just _**6**_

Spiky Joe: This is Gusty Gulch? Pretty dilapidated, if you ask me.

Mario: No one asked you.

Spiky Joe: I know, I was just saying- Never mind...

Mario: There should be Boos here...Where are they?

Ultra: Hm, maybe they're hiding, perhaps?

The heroes then hear some people yelling to the east.

Sonny: Uh, I think someone's in trouble. We should go!

Mario: What the?! I thought you left!

Sonny: Oh, I did? Well, I guess I'm still following you.

Mario and co. run further into the village to see two Toads near a big hole. One Toad, who seems angry, has Orange spots and an Orange vest. The other Toad, who seems scared, has Yellow spots and a Blue vest.

Angry Toad: Just get up! It ain't hard, Stevie!

Stevie: Sorry, my foot got stuck, Paul...

Paul?: No! It's PTool! Get it right, dammit!

Spiky Joe: Well, that's certainly nice language for the viewers.

PTool: Ah, $*%! We've been found!

Stevie: Can you not yell, please? It's...not good for my ears.

PTool: Shut it...

Mario: What's all the swears for? I'm sure there are nicer words to be used...

PTool: Augh! This red capped dope's got 3 pieces! C'mon, you wuss, summon him!

Stevie: Please don't say, "dope." OK... I summon you, uh... The Great... Uhm... Oh boy...

PTool: Oh god...What is it, Dip&%$?!

Stevie: I don't know what that M stands for...Mega? Mean? Aw...

PTool: It's Mach! Dammit, it ain't hard! Use that mushy room of a brain you have!

Stevie: But, but...I'm not sure...I really don't wanna say the name wrong...And...I just don't know...

PTool rubs his temples.

PTool: Why do I have to deal with this?

Mario walks over to Stevie, to check what's wrong.

Mario: You need something?

Stevie: Yeah, uh...I don't know what that M stands for. I think it's-

Ptool: Get out, Mr. Must-Ruin-Everything-ache!

Mario: Hoo, there's a new one...

Mario slowly backs away to his comrades.

PTool: You know the name, now summon him....

Stevie: .................I don't wanna...

PTool slowly turns his head towards Stevie.

PTool: (slowly) Why...not...?

Stevie: You're being a meanie-profanny...I...I'm throwing this down into that hole!

PTool takes the machine away from Stevie.

Stevie: Or, I'll... just leave.... Bye, Paul...

Stevie slowly walks away past Mario and friends...

PTool: OK, you're getting yours, you sos of &$!&+#! I summon you, Mach Gaogamon!

...Nothing happens...

Mario: I don't get it, what was that supposed to do?

PTool: ...Damn these long loading characters!

PTool walks over to Mario...

PTool: (quietly) He'll come... He'll come for this...

PTool gave Mario a GBA Piece! Mario doesn't know what's going on, but it's a real GBA Piece!

PTool walks into the Forever Forest.

Ultra: Anyone else find that...odd?

Mario: Meh, I stopped caring when he said, "spot." Let's go back to Russ, shall we?

Mario and heroes start their walk back to Toad Town. When they enter Forever Forest, the Boos all appear from inside the houses.

Boo 1: ...They're gone... The bad mouthed Toad's gone!

Boo 43: Finally! What should we do now?!

Boo 2B: Watch the new paint on Blubba's House dry?

Boo 3: That's tempting, but I got a better idea! Let's all scare the people of Toad Town! We haven't scared anyone since 2001!

The Boos all disappear to Toad Town. But, that's where Mario and co. are going! What'll happen? Tune in next time in the Grodus Chronicl- I mean! Spiky Joe and the Mustache!

END


	7. Chapter 7: Atomical Boo Battle!

_**Episode 7**_

Mario and co. arrive at Toad Town. But, something ain't right...

Spiky Joe: I have the feeling that something ain't right...

Mario: Really? Let's check Central Town.

Mario and co. head to Central Toad Town. There, they see a lone Boo from Gusty Gulch staring at nothing in particular.

Mario: Are you OK?

The Boo turns to Mario.

Boo: I've heard legends of that person...

Mario remembers something he long forgot.

Mario: How he plunged into enemy territory...

Boo: ...and saved his homeland.

Mario: I've heard legends of that person...

Boo: How he went into the depths of the earth...

Mario: ...reducing all he touched to rubble...

Boo: I've heard legends of that person...

Mario: I've heard legends of that person...

Boo: Revered by many...

Mario: I too revere him...

Boo: Feared by many...

Mario: I too fear him...

Spiky Joe: OK, hold it, hold it! Who are you talking about?

Mario: Anthro Bird...I went on an adventure with him. You see...I was having a friendly Brawl against a-

Spiky Joe: Can you tell me later? We need to figure out why this Boo is here!

Mario: Later...OK, so, Boo...Could you turn around?

Boo: Uhm, Kay...Tee...

The Boo faces the opposite direction of Mario. Mario then pulls on the Boo's short tail thing!

Boo: Yike! What the- Why are- You stupid- You don't touch me, ya hear?!?! Grr...**ATOMIC BOO**_**!!!**_

A whole bunch of Boos appear out of nowhere and all combine into each other to form one big Atomic Boo!

Mini Boss Battle!

Mario: 20/20 HP

Ultra: 40/40 HP

Atomic Boo: 50/50 HP

Mario/Hammer/Hammer Swing/ Mario swings his hammer at the enemy! 2 damage!

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Throw/ Ultra throws a hammer at the Boo! 4 damage!

Atomic Boo/ The Atomic Boo blows out a whole bunch of Boos at Mario! Mario does some Guard Commands to only lose 3 HP!

Mario: 17/20 HP

Ultra: 40/40 HP

Atomic Boo: 44/50 HP

Mario/Hammer/Hammer Swing/ Mario swings his hammer at the Boo! 2 damage!

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Barrage/ Ultra throws a barrage of hammers! Hence the name. 9 damage!

Atomic Boo/ The Atomic Boo closes his eyes...What the heck's he doin'? Embarrassing me to no end.

Mario: 17/20 HP 6/10 FP

Ultra: 40/40 HP

Atomic Boo: 33/50 HP

Mario/Jump/Jump Attack/ Mario jumps on the Boo! 1+1 damage!

Ultra/Hammer/Hammer Throw/ Ultra throws another hammer! 4 damage!

Atomic Boo/ The Atomic Boo opens his eyes and screams! 3 damage!

Mario: 14/20 HP 6/10 FP

Ultra: 37/40 HP

Atomic Boo: 27/50 HP

Mario/Item/Thunder Bolt/ The Atomic Boo is struck by lightning! 5 damage!

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Barrage/ Ultra throws a barrage of hammers! This time he threw 14 for 14 damage! He must be one good button masher.

Atomic Boo/ The Atomic Boo body slams Ultra! Yowch, 6 damage!

Mario: 14/20 HP 2/10 FP

Ultra: 31/40 HP

Atomic Boo: 8/50 HP

Mario/Hammer/Power Smash/ Mario uses the rest of his FP to deliver a strong blow! 4 damage!

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Throw/ Ultra finishes off the Atomic Boo with a lone hammer toss! 4 damage!

Atomic Boo is defeated!

20 Star Points!

------------------------

Boo #3: Wah! Why'd I suggest this?! C'mon, let's leave before we get another beating!

All the Boos disappear to Gusty Gulch.

Mario: Hey, Ultra, thanks for depleting my FP supply.

Ultra: What? You can always go sleep in the Toad House. Unless...

Just then, the MachGaogamon that PTool summoned appears to fight Mario!

Mario: Aw, come on! I don't have any FP left!

Spiky Joe: We can beat him! We're the heroes!

Boss Battle!!!

To Be Continued...


	8. Chapter 8: The Legend is Troof

_**Episode 8**_

The clichéd crossover has begun. It begins with a...

Boss Battle!

Mario: 14/20 HP 0/10 FP

Ultra: 31/40 HP

MGaogamon: 80/80 HP

Mario/Hammer/Hammer Swing/ Mario swings his hamer at the enemy! But 2 is less than 5 so...0 damage!

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Throw/ Ultra throws a lone hammer at MGaogamon! That doesn't have an affect if MGaogamon's defense is 5...

Mario: Aw, come on, this, like, the first Boss Battle!

MGaogamon/ MGaogamon uses Winning Knuckle on Mario! Ow, 10 damage!

Mario: 4/20 HP_**!**_ 0/10 FP

Ultra: 31/40 HP

End Battle Sequence

Spiky Joe: I don't feel very confident now...

Mario: I feel light-headed...

??: You can't handle anything, can ya?

Ultra: You hear something?

Just then, a Falco clone using the yellow Falco outfit jumps at the MGaogamon, does a whole bunch of fancy aerial moves, and defeats the MGaogamon with ease. When he lands, he crosses his arms all c00l like, leaving Spiky Joe and Ultra in awe. Mario's light-headed from lack of HP.

Spiky Joe: (amazed) That was awesome...Are you the Fonz?

Ultra: Hey, I think that's the Anthro Bird Mario talked and, uh, sang about...

Spiky Joe: Hey, yeah! Mustache, is that the Anthro Bird who, um...saved his homeland by going in enemy lines?

Mario: Habda Puduptle...

Spiky Joe: ...Oh, right, he's Danger Mario...

Spiky Joe/Item/Chocolate Pig/ Spiky Joe gives Mario a Chocolate Pig! Mario's health is restored!

Mario: Ya got any music?

Spiky Joe: Now's not the time to groove, Mustache, I think Anthro Bird saved us.

Mario: Huh? Oh, hey...Wah! It's you! You helped me defeat the evil clones! And you gave me cake right before the Star Festival! Too bad Bowser messed the festival all up... So, Anthro Bird, how've you been?

Anthro Bird grits his beak...He doesn't like being called "Anthro Bird" it seems...

Anthro Bird: (calm) ...Haven't you figured out my name?

Mario: Is it...Yelco? The evil clones talked about a Yelco...And you're wearing yellow...And you're a Falco clone...

Yelco?: That's my...old name...It's Xion Inferno.

Mario: Sorry, that's taken...That's a YouTuber's screen name.

Xion?: R-Really? ...And it took me forever to come up with that... I'm not changing it again, my name's Xion Inferno, and that's that.

Mario: Xion Inferno That's That? Pretty long name...

Xion facepalms... (CT)

Mario: Hey, are you joining our adventure?

Xion: Maybe...I'll keep an eye on you...In case you get yourself into trouble again...

Xion jumps into the air and disappears...

Ultra: ...This adventure's getting pretty weird...

Mario: Audi fadam illius...

Spiky Joe: ???

Mario: Let's go see Russ, we're one piece away from a magic GBA! Rhyme!

Mario and co. run off to Russ's house.

* * *

Mario and party now enter Russ's house to see a pile of books covering something...

Mario: Hey, there, book pile!

A pair of eyes appear beneath the books...

Eyes? : Well? Is it safe to come out?

Mario: Yes, all clear...

Russ comes out of the book pile.

Mario: Wh-What?! Y-You're...

Russ: OK, we can stop the Perfect Dark quotes...

Mario: Aw, it actually could've worked out here...

Russ: So, the Boos are gone right?

Mario: Mm hm!

Russ: Oh, good. They really- Mario, you know you can speak here...

Mario: Uh huh!

Russ: Really, knock it off, talk normally... I know this is acted out as a Paper Mario game, but in the fic version, you talk normally...

Mario: Bleah, fine! Where's the next GBA Piece at?

Russ: Hm...The map showed a floating...thing with a Chain Chomp...

Mario: You mean the Glitz Pit?

Russ: Yes, that seems to be the place!

Spiky Joe:_** !**_

Ultra: Hm? Hey, Spiky, there something wrong?

Spiky Joe: Uh, uh, uh...C-Can I-s-sit this one...out, p-please?

Mario: No, I have to deal with this adventure, so you do too!

Russ: Tell us what's wrong, Spiky Joe...

Spiky Joe: *gulp* I...got kicked out...If they see me...I'll go to jail!

Mario: Jail exists in Mario games? Er... What could you have done to get kicked out? Eavesdropping? Going in restricted rooms? Destroying walls? I did all that stuff and I didn't get kicked out!

Spiky Joe: I uhm...accidentally Spike Bombed...Miss Jolene...

Mario, Russ, and Ultra: ..............Why....?

Spiky Joe: It was an accident, I swear!

Mario: We're not allowed to swear...

Ultra: PTool did...a lot...That was a big risk for this fic...

Spiky Joe: ...I was thinking about...a dream I had...Then I felt someone touch my tail, and I...

Mario: This boring, give us the quick version! We're only allowed 10,000 characters!

Russ: Mario, that's not helping...

Spiky Joe: No, he's right, I'm dragging this thing...

Mario: And besides...I got a smrt plan. ;)

Russ: You misspelled smart...

Mario: I meant to! ...C'mon, let's go to the port place, I have a smrt plan...

Mario, Spiky Joe, and Ultra head off to the port so they can get on a boat. It cost them 255 coins, but Mario had a lot of coins from the badges he sold off air. That boat took them to Rogueport, where the Cheep Blimp was. But, Mario needs a ticket for the Cheep Blimp...Another trip to the Pianta Syndicate Boss! Next time...

END


	9. Chapter 9: Ringin' the Blimp

_**Episode 9**_

Mario and co. have just entered Frankie's office, and are ready to ask for a favour from the Don. And just to set the setting, Francesca is standing next to Frankie and Frankie is behind the desk. And there are two random Piantas standing in the back of the room...Silent...Almost invisible...

Frankie: Huh? Hey, it's you! Are you on some other world savin' adventure?

Mario: No, not now. But I need a ticket for the Cheep Blimp. My ticket apparently expired...

Frankie: No problem, I got some... Here ya go, free of charge for savin' the dimension.

Francesca: Frankie! You can't do anything until you find your wedding ring! Don't tell me you forgot about it!

Mario: (Again with the stupid ring?)

Frankie: I didn't forget, my little sweetie pie! But, Mario probably needs this ticket. It'll only take 5 seconds.

Francesca: No! Our love comes first above all!

Frankie: But...

Francesca: Above _**ALL**_!!!!

Frankie: But...

Francesca: Don't you love me anymore?!?!

Frankie: You know the answer! I love you with all my heart, booger biscuit! I just need to-

Francesca: Then say it 100 times!

Mario: (This again?!)

Frankie: *sigh* OK...

I love you...

I love you...

I love you...

I love you...

I love you...

I love you...

I love you...

I love you...

I love you...

I love you...

I love you... 11

I love you...12

I love you...13

I love you...14

I love you...15

I love you...16

I love you...17

I love you...18

I love you...19

I love you...20

I love you...21

I love you...22

I love you...23

I love you...24

I love you...25

I love you...26

I love you...27

I love you...28

I love you...29

I love you...30

I love you...31

I love you...32

I love you...33

I love you...34

I love you...35

I love you...36

I love you...37

I love you...38

I love you...39

I love you...40

I love you...41

I love you...42

I love you...43

I love you...44

I love you...45

I love you...46

I love you...47

I love you...48

I love you...49

I love you...50

I love you...51

I love you...52

I love you...53

I love you...54

I love you...55

I love you...56

I love you...57

I love you...58

I love you...59

I love you...60

I love you...61

I love you...62

I love you...63

I love you...64

I love you...65

I love you...66

I love you...67

I love you...68

I love you...69

I love you...70

I love you...71

I love you...72

I love you...73

I love you...74

I love you...75

I love you...76

I love you...77

I love you...78

I love you...79

I love you...80

I love you...81

I love you...82

I love you...83

I love you...84

I love you...85

I love you...86

I love you...87

I love you...88

I love you...89

I love you...90

I love you...91

I love you...92

I love you...93

I love you...94

I love you...95

I love you...96

I love you...97

I love you...98

I love you...99

I love you...100

Phew...

Francesca: Aw, Frankie, you're so sweet! :P

Frankie: ...

Mario: ZzzZzzzz...

Frankie: So, where is the ring?

Francesca: I dunno! You're the one who lost it!

Frankie: Oh, right...

Spiky Joe: Hey, is that the ring over by the door?

lol, it is...

Frankie: Uh, found it!

Frankie runs over to the door, picks up the ring, and puts it on his hand.

Mario: ZZzzZz... Ah, Spaghetti...

Frankie then goes all the way back to his desk, opens a drawer, takes out a blue ticket, walks over to Mario, slaps Mario awake, and gives Mario the ticket.

Mario: 19/20 HP

Mario received the Blimp Ticket! Required to get on the Cheep Blimp.

Mario: Ow...OK, let's get out of here before they start doing more lovey dovey stuff!

Mario and co. exit the office and stop after they exit the shop.

Ultra: Alright, now we're getting to Glitzville! Hope this idea of yours works out, Mario.

Mario and co. run off to the Cheep Blimp, and get on... On the blimp, Mario finds a phone! Don't ask why it's there, OK? Anyway, Mario decides to call someone.

Luigi: Hello?

Mario: Hi! It's-a me, Mario!

Luigi: Oh, hi bro.! How're you holdin' up?

Mario: Good...Guess where I'm calling from!

Luigi: Uh...A plane?

Mario: No, a blimp!

Luigi: Oh, haha, funny...Say, I'm on an adventure.

Mario: ...Really?

Luigi: Yeah! I'm searching for magical DS pieces! Wanna hear about it?

Mario: ...Er, no, I'm too busy?

Luigi: That's OK, bye, Bro.!

Mario: Bye. *Mario hangs up the phone* Looks like someone's on an adventure similar to mine again...I'm sure the fans would get a kick out of it...

I'm sure you people will! Look forward to it...During another SJatM episode. Like, a long time later... Maybe...

END

Unicode...


	10. Chapter 10: Return for Glitz and Glory

Episode 10

Mario and co. arrive at Glitzville.

Mario: No matter how many times I come here, I'll always wonder how this thing can float.

Spiky Joe: ...

Mario and his peeps walk through the automated doors of the Glitz Pit, then walk over to the security guard standing in front of the non-automated door which leads to the Locker Rooms.

Guard #2: Hey, you can't come in here, bub... This where we make sausages... Man Sausages...

Mario: Mm hmm, yeah... I'm the Great Gonzales, I'm allowed to enter.

Guard #2: Oh rly? Then show me your Champion Belt.

Mario: Ya rly... But... Uh... I left it at home...

Guard #2: Likely story, bub... Then go get it, if you want in.

Mario: Augh!

Mario then goes all the way to the Cheep Blimp, waits for the next boat to the Mushroom Kingdom, gets on the boat with his party members, goes to his house, searches for his belt, gives up on it, sees that Spiky Joe found it under Mario's bed, takes the belt, puts it in the Key Items slot, gets groggy, goes all the way back to the boat, misses the boat, waits for the next boat, gets on the boat, arrives at Rogueport, gets back on the Cheep Blimp, goes to the Guard, and shows him the Champion's Belt.

Guard #4: What's that thing, bub?

Mario: Ah! This is the Champion's Belt! I spent 5 hours to get it just to get back in those Locker Rooms!!

Guard #4: Geez, OK, I just switched shifts, so I didn't know what was going on.

The guard moves out of the way to let Mario and co. through the door. They walk into Jolene's office without knocking.

Jolene: _**!**_ Mario! Most normal people knock before they enter a private room, ya know!

Mario: Meh, what're ya going to do?

Jolene: ...Well, why is it that you're back? Were you going to give the audience a good battle?

Mario: Yeah, that is part of my plans for today.

Jolene: _**!**_ What is _he_ doing here?!

Spiky Joe: ...

Jolene: Don't you understand the rules of a restraining order?!

Mario: Who are you talking about? This R.S. Buzzy Beetle?

Jolene: Yes!

Mario: Ooooohh, this isn't the R.S. Top who you think it is.

Jolene: He isn't?

Spiky Joe: I isn't?

Mario: Noooo... This is not Spiky Joe... This is, uh, Spik3y Joe!

Spik3y Joe: (He can't possibly expect Jolene to fall for that!)

Jolene: ...Spik3y Joe?

Mario: Uh huh!

Jolene: ...Well, OK then. I assume he's your new partner, yes?

Spik3y Joe: :O

Mario: Yep! This wanna be me Hammer Bro. is, too!

Jolene: Ah, well, that's good, yes? I'll just update your profile on our Wiki and YourSpace.

Spik3y Joe: :O

Jolene: Hm? Oh, looks like you aren't on our roster anymore. Hm... Looks like we don't even have any files for you anymore...

Mario: NOT AGAIN!!!

Jolene: Now, now, Mario, no need to get all caps lock on us. Ah, here it is. Found your profile. Hm... It says you're, "A dumbfounded /\/008 who hacks the systems to get to the top." And you're ranked lower than the Goomba Bros.!

Mario: :O

Jolene: Hm, well... I guess our records are correct. Sorry, Mr. Gonzales, you have to start all from the beginning if you want to become champ. I'll take that belt, please.

Mario's Champion Belt disappears from his Key Items slot.

Mario: :O

Jolene: So, Mr. Gonzales, if you would, please head yourself over to the Minor League Locker Room.

Mario reluctantly walks to the Minor League Locker Room.

-----------------------------

But, meanwhile...

Mafefe: ha! thatll teach him to referenc that losers fan fiction!

Back at the Glitz Pit, Mario sees all his old Minor League Homies, and explains his predicament.

END

Short chapter is short.


	11. Chapter 11: Battle! One and Two!

Episode 11

With Mario's predicament explained, he and his partners get ready for the first match. Mario presses the A Button on the Terminal, causing a recording of Jolene to appear on screen.

Jolene: OK, [Mr. Gonzales], you ready? This time, you're going against [The Goomba Bros.]. I want you to [trip and blame Sakurai]. Now get out there and [win].

The Terminal's screen flickers off while Mario walks over to the door. He thinks about how and when he should trip. But, he doesn't get much time to think, as the Security barges into the room, slamming Mario with the door.

Mario: 19/20 HP

Guard #17: Alright, bub, time for your match, come with me.

Mario shakes off the pain and begins to tell off the Guard on how he doesn't know the meaning of "knock." But, the Guard just walks away, with Mario and co. following.

* * *

The audience in the Glitz Pit arena was like lightning. But, the music wasn't very soothing, so nobody started grooving... But, the audience was still greatly anticipating the return of the Great Gonzales.

Jolene: OK, everyone! In this next battle we have the Superstar Sequel, the Great Gonzales versus the Meteorite Hardheads, the Goomba Bros.!

Ultra: Ha! We're not gonna go down easily!

Goomba Bro. #1: You remember that we're Bros.! We can't lose if we combine our strength!

Mario: But, you guys are in last... You mustn't be combing your stre-

Goomba Bro. #4: Yo, you're the wimps in last!

Goomba Bro. #4 runs at Mario and head bonks Mario, getting the first strike!

Mario: 18/20 HP

Ultra: 30/30 HP

Mario/Jump/Multibounce/ Mario uses Action Commands to Jump on all of the Goomba Bros. one at a time. But, right before jumping on the last Goomba, Mario does a somersault, misses the Goomba, trips, and falls on his back.

Mario: Darn it, why did Sakurai have to mess with this game and add tripping?!

One Goomba remains...

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Whack/ Ultra walks up to the foe and whacks him with a hammer! 4 damage!

The Goomba Bros. are defeated! 5 Star Points!

Jolene: We got ourselves a winner! The Great-

Mario: Uh, excuse me, but can you call me Mustache instead? That's my name now...

Jolene: Right... This game's winner is the Mustache!

Ultra: No problem at all!

* * *

Mario and co. return to the Minor League Locker Room to receive payment...

Jolene: That battle was pretty decent, but I think you could have done more Stylish moves... Well, here's your fight money: 1 coin.

Mario receives 1 coin! Mario's ranking rose to 24!

Mario stares disappointingly at his coin...

Jolene: Now if you excuse me, I must be going.

Jolene exits via the door, leaving Mario to stare at his dull coin...

Mario: This is less than the last time... I got 3 coins last I was here...

Spik3y Joe: Well, while you were gone, we got some new fighters, so the payment had to be deducted some for Minor Leaguers.

Mario: This episode is looking a little short... I think we can fit one more match in!

Mario activates the Terminal and awaits the recording's instructions.

Jolene: Hello there [Mustache], you will now go against [The Dead Bones]. In this match, I wish for you to [Dash Taunt when you win] after you win. Now [win] your best!

Mario: These recordings seem pretty lazily done...

* * *

Jolene: Welcome all! Our next match of today features the Bone-Rattling Rockers, the Dead Bones! The challenger approaching them is none other than the Velutinous Vaulter! Yes, that is the Great Mustache!

Spik3y Joe: No holding back, right Mustache?

Dead Bone Guy #1: We're gonna take the skin off YOUR bones!

Jolene: That's still creepy... Er, let's get ready to... BRAAAAAWL!

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario swings his hammer down at the foe! 1 damage!

Dull Bones #1 defeated!

Spik3y Joe/Attack/Shell Shot/ Spik3y Joe spins inside his shell and shoots himself at the opponent! 1 damage!

Dull Bones #2 defeated!

Dull Bones #3/Tactics/ The Dull Bones builds a new partner!

Dull Bones #4 joined the fight!

Mario: 18/20 HP

Spik3y Joe: 15/15 HP

Dull Bones #3: 1/1 HP

Dull Bones #4: 1/1 HP

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario swings his hammer down at the opponent and ends with a back flip! 1 damage!

Dull Bones #4 became tame!

Spik3y Joe/Attack/Shell Shot/ Spik3y Joe does the same move he did last time! 1 damage!

Dull Bones #3 is defeated!

5 Star Points received!

Mario taps left and right quickly to run left to right in one spot as a taunt.

Jolene: The Great Mustache has triumphed over the Dead Bones!

Spik3y Joe: Yeah, this is too easy!

* * *

Jolene: A very well done match Mr. Mustache. Here you go.

Mario gained 2 coins! Mario's ranking rose to 23!

Jolene: Oh, look, you're ranked as 23! Here's a bonus.

Mario gained 3 more coins!

Jolene: Have a good day, Mr. Mustache. Now if you'll excuse me, I must be going.

Mario: I still think we can fit another math in...

Spik3y Joe: Another math? OK... We used up 5,050 characters so far. I did that with subtraction.

Mario: D'oh! I meant match!

Spik3y Joe: Oh, well, the episode is long enough, let's just END it now.

END


	12. Chapter 12: You Spinia Me Right Round

_**Episode 12**_

Jolene: Good battle, Mr. Mustache. Here's your fight money:

Mario receives 14 coins! Mario's ranking rose to 11!

Jolene: Now if you excuse me, I must be going.

Jolene exits the locker room through the door. Mario rests up in the bed to recover HP and FP, then goes to the Terminal to request his next match.

Jolene: Hello there [Mustache], you will now go against [The Destructors]. In this match, I wish for you to [Purposely damage yourself] to yourself. Now don't [win] up!

Mario walks in front of the door as Security Guard 4 swings the door open. Mario barely dodges the door, and tries to rant about the lack of manners there are in a Pit full of Glitz, but the Security Guard just slaps a sticky note on Mario's mouth.

Sticky Note: Invalid Request. Please follow me.

* * *

Jolene: Yes, welcome to another exciting edition of Mushroomy Idol! Tonight, we have the Glamorous Peach Fuzz in a rap battle with the Destructious Dancers!

Security Guard 37 walks up to Jolene and tells her that, "Mushroomy Idol's tomorrow night."

Jolene: Oops, how comedic relief of me! I meant, welcome to the Glitz Pit! Our next match features the Velutinous Vaulter, the Mustache, versus the Flying Bullets, the Destructors!

Spik3y Joe: Why am I fighting again? Isn't Ultra more suited for this?

Spinia #2: You got bad luck gettin' matched up with us!

Jolene: Alright, let's get ready to BRAAAAWL!

Mario/Jump/Normal Bounce/ Mario jumps on the Spania! ...But, Spania has spikes, so that hurt Mario... Mario takes 1 HP of damage!

Spik3y Joe/Attack/Shell Shot/ Spik3y Joe spins inside his shell and shoots off at the Spinia! 2 damage!

Spinia/Attack/ Two Spinia spin at Mario and one at Spik3y Joe! Thanks to proper Guarding techniques, Mario takes 1 damage and Spik3y Joe nothing!

Spania/Attack/ The Spania attack both Spik3y Joe and Mario! They both take 1 damage!

Mario: 22/25 HP

Spik3y Joe: 14/15 HP

Spinia #1: 1/3 HP

Spinia #2: 3/3 HP

Spinia #3: 3/3 HP

Spania #1: 3/3 HP

Spania #2: 3/3 HP

Mario/Jump/Multi Bounce/ Mario bounces on the three Spinia... But also jumps on that Spania again... Ouch! 1 damage to Mario and 1 damage to the Spinia.

Spinia #1 is defeated!

Spik3y Joe/Attack/Power Shell/ Spik3y Joe uses FP to attack all ground enemies! 2 damage to those ground people!

Spinia #2/Other/ Spinia starts to cry... :'(

Spinia #3/Attack/ Spinia #3 attacks Spik3y Joe! Spik3y Joe does a SuperGuard!

Spinia #3 is defeated!

Spania #1/Attack/ Spania #1 attacks Mario! Mario Guards! Damage is negated!

Spania #2/Other/ Spania #2 comforts Spinia #2... Friendship went up by 1!

Mario: 22/25 HP

Spik3y Joe: 14/15 HP

Spinia#2: 1/3 HP :'(

Spania #1: 1/3 HP

Spania #2: 1/3 HP

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario brings down his hammer on Spinia #2!

Spinia #2 is defeated!

Spania #2 went aggro!

Spik3y Joe/Attack/Shell Shot/ Spik3y Joe shoots himself at Spania #1!

Spania #1 is defeated!

Spania #2/Item/ Spania #2 uses a Mushroom... But, he drops it on the ground, and the Mushroom spoils...

Mario/Jump/Normal Bounce/ Mario's stupid, so he decides to jump on the Spania... Mario takes 1 damage...

Spik3y Joe facepalms! (CT)

Spik3y Joe/Attack/Shell Shot/ Spik3y Joe shoots himself at the aggravated Spania!

Spania #2 is defeated!

12 Star Points gained!

Jolene: And we have found ourselves the winner! The Mustache!

Spik3y Joe: I can't imagine how your foot feels after that, Mustache...

* * *

Jolene: Nice job out there, Mustache. Here's your payment.

Mario received 15 coins! His ranking is now 10!

Jolene: Now, if you excuse me, I must be going.

Jolene exits the locker room.

Mario: So, quite a pointless filler chapter, huh, Spik3y?

Spik3y Joe: Of course! That's because it's filler night! Right, Koopra?

Koopra: Yep, that's right!

King K.: Yo, M-Dude, you're doing yourself great in the pit! You'll make 1st rank in no time!

Mario: I know, right?! ...Hey, wait, 1st?! Why's that?! Don't you mean Champ Rank?!

King K.: Oh, yeah, uh... This new champ beat down Rawk Hawk in two turns, dude... Sorry, but, I doubt you could beat this new champ...

Mario: Huh?! Whattya mean!? I could beat Rawk Hawk in one turn if I applied enough Power Plus badges!

King K.: Well, this guy didn't use any badges... So, yeah... But, listen, you don't need to be champ, right? Ya could settle for 1st, right, M Money?

Mario: No, I must be Champ! Who's this new Champy guy!

Spik3y Joe: I've heard of him, Mustache. I think he was called the "Infernos Falcon."

Mario: Infernon Birdon, eh? Sounds like a wimp!

King K.: No, Muster, not "Infernon Birdon," the "Infernos Falcon."

Mario: I know, that's what I said, "Flaming Turkey."

Spik3y Joe: Mustache, it's "Infernos Falcon."

Mario: Yeah, that's what I said. He's the, "Fire Fowl."

Spik3y Joe facepalms once again. (CT)

Mario: OK then, I'm just gonna go get ready for the next match. Though, the readers will be skipped ahead to whenever I reach rank 1, to stop all the filler.

END


	13. Chapter 13: Final Prologue Battle!

_**Episode 13**_

The moment of troof has come... Mario has worked incredibly hard to get this far. The Armored Harriers were near impossible to beat without a Yoshi. It was a good thing Bowser dropped in and stomped them so Bowser could stomp Mario... But, Mario did the stomping. The Craw-Daddy was also quite an adversary. What with learning new moves, like the Spear Spin and Eye Poke. But, after many, _many_ losses, Mario and party earned their number 1 rank... But, they still had one more match....

Jolene: Wow, I never thought [you] would get this far! OK, I was [kidding, I knew you'd make it here. ; )] ready. So, now it's [the final battle], [Vs.] [The Infernos Falcon]! I hope you've [trained] hard for this! You know [what]? [No special conditions] this time. Just get out there, and do [your] best!

The terminal screen flickers off and Mario, Spik3y Joe, and Ultra prepare themselves for the Champion Battle.

Spik3y Joe: Hoo, I've never felt this way before. I feel all sorts of nervous and serious. I just know this will be a tricky one.

Ultra: Yeah, but we'll get through it no problem at all! There's not a worry in my mind!

Mario: This is like the Final Boss Battle... Except, we're only in the Prologue chapter of the game... Imagine how it'll be like when we reach the TRUE Final Battle.

Spik3y Joe: Man, don't even mention it!

Security Guard #23 walks in and escorts the gang to the ring...

* * *

Jolene: This is it! You all thought it, and now you'll watch it! Once you do, you can't un-watch it! This match will certainly be worth 200 coins a seat!

Security Guard #69 walks over to Jolene and whispers something in her ear, then walks away.

Jolene: Oh, good! Without further stalling for time, let's see our challenger! The Velutinous Vaulter! The great Gonzales! The Muuuustache!

Mario, Spik3y Joe, and Ultra walk in waving at the chanting crowd.

Audience: Mustache Must Win! Mustache Must Win! Mushtroom Mustin! D'ooooh! Mustache Must Win!

Mario and the two jump up into the ring, as Jolene walks over for a quick interview.

Jolene: Mustache, you must be feeling all sorts of emotions right now! you must tell us, how do you think you'll fare against our reigning champ?

I'll whup him, but good!

I'm gonna lose, no doubt...

Meh...

Mario: Meh...

Jolene: Well, there you have it! He obviously could care less! His mind must be completely free of all stress!

Mario's Mind: (They're really gettin' late with the Green Coin making. They said they'd renew them, but noooo...)

Jolene: And here's our Champion coming in now! The Winged Terror! The Feathery Pecker! Theeee Infernos Faaalcon!

The right most door opens, as a Falco clone using the yellow Falco outfit jumps out, does an insane Shell Cracker (Triple Back flip with a 1620° spin), and lands in the ring, ready for his battle. Mario's thoughts are stopped completely as he notices this...

Mario: ...You're following me... I can't believe I didn't see this coming...

Spik3y Joe: Aaaaawww man....

Ultra: ....

Xion: *sigh*

Jolene: Alright, let's get ready to BRAAAAWL!

Mario: 30/30 HP

Spik3y Joe: 15/15 HP

Xion: 50/50 HP

Mario/Tactics/Bestiary/ Mario goes to the Mario Wiki to look up information on Xion!

Mario: Uh oh, that's the person I've heard legends about! He has an Attack of 4 and a Defense of 0. All his attacks are the same as Falco's, since he _is_ a clone of him... But, he might know more than Falco, so who knows? Apparently not the Mario Wiki... This dumb website says I'm supposed to lose. I'll show you, Kahran042!

Spik3y Joe/Attack/Shell Shot/ Spik3y Joe shoots himself at the opponent! 2 damage!

Xion/Attack/ Xion performs a multi-kick at Mario! 5 damage!

Mario: 25/30 HP

Spik3y Joe: 15/15 HP

Xion: 48/50 HP

Mario/Hammer/Power Smash/ Mario uses FP to bring down a powerful smash! 4 damage!

Spik3y Joe/Attack/Shell Shot/ Spik3y Joe shoots himself at Xion! 2 damage!

Xion/Tactics/ Xion closes his eyes and concentrates...

Mario: 25/30 HP

Spik3y Joe: 15/15 HP

Xion: 42/50 HP

Mario/Hammer/Power Smash/ Mario does the same thing he did last turn... But Xion counters it! Mario takes 8 damage!

Spik3y Joe/Technique/Shell Loop/ Spik3y Joe shoots at Xion... But, Xion counters that too...6 damage to Spik3y Joe!

Xion/Attack/ Xion cuts Spik3y Joe with his sharp feather things! 4 damage!

Mario: 17/30 HP

Spik3y Joe: 5/15 HP _**!**_

Xion: 42/50 HP

Mario/Jump/Normal bounce/ Mario jumps on Xion twice! 1+1 damage!

Spik3y Joe/Attack/Shell Shot/ Spik3y Joe does the move he keeps doing... 2 damage!

Xion/Attack/ Xion does a fully charged Smash attack on Spik3y Joe! SMAAAAASH! Poor little Buzzy Beetle... 8 mortal damage to him!

Spik3y Joe is defeated!

Will Mario use next Pokémon?

Mario: It's Ok, SPIK3Y JOE! Come back!

Mario: Hang in there, ULTRA!

Mario sent out Ultra to fight at his side!

Mario: 17/30 HP

Ultra: 30/30 HP

Xion: 38/50 HP

Mario/Bros. Moves/Bro. Toss/ Mario does a Bros. move!

Ultra: What? But, we're not brothers...We're hardly related.

Mario: Close enough!

Mario picks up Ultra, spins him right round, and throws him at Xion! 5 damage!

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Throw/ Ultra throws a lone hammer! 4 damage!

Xion/Technique/ Xion charges up power! Attack +4!

Mario: 17/30 HP

Ultra: 30/30 HP

Xion: 29/50 HP

Mario/Jump/Power Bounce/ Mario uses FP to do many bounces on Xion! Xion rolls his eyes and stops Mario with a kick in the face? Aw, he's cheating now... Mario loses 3 HP...

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Throw/ Ultra throws a hammer at the opponent! 4 damage!

Xion/Attack/ Xion unleashes a hard attack on Ultra's weak point! Massive damage!

Mario: 14/30 HP

Ultra: 18/30 HP

Xion: 25/50 HP

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario whacks Xion with his hammer! 2 damage!

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Barrage/ Ultra throws many hammers at Xion! 10 damage!

Xion/Attack/ Xion unleashes a fierce combination of attacks on both Mario and partner! 6 damage!

Mario: 8/30 HP

Ultra: 12/30 HP

Xion: 13/50 HP

Mario: Hey, I think we can win this! You just need to use your Hammer Barrage, ultra!

Ultra: Yeah! See, this ain't a problem!

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario swings down his hammer! 2 damage!

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Barrage/ Not enough FP for this move!

Mario: ...We're doomed...

Ultra: No! We can still win! There's no giving up!

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Throw/ Ultra throws a lone hammer at Xion! 4 damage!

Xion/Attack/Infernos Falcon/ Xion performs the signature move he made up two minutes ago! He somehow gets set on fire and charges at Mario and Ultra at full speed! Ow... 7 damage!

Mario: 1/30 HP _**!**_

Ultra: 5/30 HP _**!**_

Xion: 7/50 HP

Mario: OK, we can win as long as we both do our moves perfectly... You go first, Ultra...

Ultra/Attack/Hammer Throw/ Ultra throws a lone hammer at Xion! 4 damage!

Mario/Jump/Normal Bounce/ Mario jumps on Xion! 1+1 damage!

Xion: 1/50 HP _**!**_

Ultra: Way to go, man, you _added it wrong_!

Mario: Waaa!

Xion/Attack/ Xion shakes his head, and flicks Mario in the nose... 1 damage... Mario fainted....

Jolene: Woah! That was a heated match! The Infernos Falcon holds his spot as the Champion of the Glitz Pit!

Half of the audience cheers for Xion, while the other half is booing at Xion, while a quarter of the audience is booing Mario. Mario lies unconscious as Ultra angrily carries him and Spik3y Joe back to the locker room...

* * *

Mario wakes up in the Major League Locker Room with Spik3y Joe, Ultra, and the Koopinator staring at him.

Spik3y Joe: :\

Ultra: :(

Koopinator: Just pitiful...

Mario: :'(

Spik3y Joe: Mustache, Xion wanted to see you in his room. I think we should get going.

Mario and co. exit the Locker Room with the Koopinator following them.

Mario: Yo yo, don't follow us! What you doing?!

Koopinator: I just wanna watch the show...

Mario rolls his eyes and continues his way to the Champion's Room.

Security Guard #8: Hey, bub. The champ invited you in. Yer pretty lucky. Ok, go on ahead.

The Security guard gets out of the way and Mario with the other people go inside. It's just like it was when Mario was last here. Just with a big poster of Xion on the wall over the bed...

Mario: I miss my good ol' poster...

Ultra: Hey, where's Xion? Are we early?

Spik3y Joe: Well, there's a piece of paper on the bed.

Mario examines the piece of paper.

Mario: "You almost had it, but you're just not good enough. *coughnicemathcough* But all you wanted was the GBA Piece in Jolene's room. So, just search around under the paper's initial position and you'll know what to do next." Hm... Initial?

Spik3y Joe: There's something under the bed, Mustache.

Mario: What are you looking under people's beds for, huh? I oughtta go under the bed and pick up whatever's in there so you can't have it!

Mario pulls out a cake that has another piece of paper on it.

Mario: Moar paper? "Remember the Fat-Headed Kid's line from Ed, Edd, & Eddy: 'There's a hammer... in the cake. Wait up, Kevin!' "

Mario stares at the cake, thinking about Portal, and if the cake is a lie or not... He finally decides on an action to do... He slams his head into the cake!

Spik3y Joe: Mario, what are you doing?!

Mario: Ah, delicious!

Ultra: Mario, it's on your head.

Mario: What? What's on my head?

Ultra: The Super Hammer! Can I have-

Mario: A Bugzy?! GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF!

Spik3y Joe: I just knew this was gonna end like that episode of Ed, Edd, & Eddy... just without us being stuck in a cement block...

Mario grabs the hammer on his head and pulls it off his head. Mario received the Super Hammer! His hammer Attack power increases by 1, and can now break yellow blocks and other similar objects!

Ultra: This episode is a **stub**. please make it better, by getting the creator to use more jokes, and not just quotes from copyrighted shows and web sites.

Mario: Hey, I'm the one who makes the quotes, 'K?

Mario knows what to do next. He jumps on top of the presents on the left side of the room, jumps over to the door, footstool jumps off of Ultra's head, and grabs the ledge on the right side of the room, which has a vent on it. Mario gets his hammer ready, twists himself up into two or three knots, and swings his hammer at the vent, breaking it down. His partners magically warp to him, and they continue through inside the air ducts.

At the end of the ducts, they can hear Jolene talking about something...

Jolene: Now please ensure it doesn't happen again, OK, Bandy?

Bandy: Yeah, yeah, sure. No more followin' you around...

Bandy Andy exits the room as Mario breaks down the vent of Jolene's Office.

Jolene: **!** Mr. Mustache! You do realize it's illegal to break down air vents, am I right?

Mario: What? I've done it before... I just need to scour your office for a couple of hours...

Jolene: Excuse me?!

Mario: No u... Er, I mean, me... No me.

Mario walks over to Jolene's desk and opens up a drawer to find a

Star Piece! **:** D

Mario then opens another drawer to find a GBA Piece! That's all seven! Er, wait, I lost count, wasn't it four? Uh, three in Forever Forest, one in the Ice Place, and Glitz it is one. Yeah, it's five. That's all five!

Jolene: Mustache, I really find this disrespectful to my privacy.

Mario: Who cares? I got what I wanted and moar, so I'm just gonna leave now.

Mario and the gang quickly run out of Jolene's office and onto the Cheep Blimp to Rogueport.

Jolene: *sigh* Well, at least I still have my picture of... *gasp* HEY!

* * *

Immediately after, on the Cheep Blimp...

Mario: Haw haw hee! Man, look at this hilarious picture! Oh, how humiliating for her!

Spiky Joe: Aw, man, that's so mean, but sooo funny! XD

Ultra: You just can't look at this without laughing, I'm sorry!

Koopinator: Oh hohoho!

Mario: ...Will you get out of here?!

Koopinator: ...I thought we were good buds... Fine... I'm still sticking with you, though. I'll just be silent, like a True Warrior...

Mario: Yeah, if you were a true warrior, you'd be champ, but are you? No.

Koopinator: I must re-quintuple my training... You'll see.....

END


	14. Chapter 14: Luigi's Tiring Story Part 1

_**Episode 14**_

Mario, Spiky Joe, Ultra... and the Koopinator triumphantly walk to Russ T.'s house with all 5 of their GBA Pieces. Mario hums a cheerful marching tune along the way. Mario decides to stop and read the Bulletin Board in front of Merlon's house.

Bulletin Board: **Toad Town News** Ancient prophecy transcribed! "When five of magic entertainment chips assemble, purple cloud will devour the cake." Who knows what this could mean!

Mario frowns for a second, then checks the backside of the Board.

Backside Board: **Suing News Weekly** Local Fisherman catches a Blue Whale! The whale was seen for only a second as environmentalists ran up and cut the wire from the fishing pole, freeing the whale. Needless to say, Local Fisherman sued for "Food thievery."

---Soot T.

Mario: Now that's something I can laugh at! I just don't feel like laughing, is all...

Luigi then spots Mario behind the Bulletin Board.

Luigi: Hey, Bro.! What are you doing?

Mario peeks out from behind the Bulletin Board and slowly walks out from behind it.

Mario: Nothing...

Luigi: Oh, that's cool! I've just gotten my 5th Magical DS Piece! I remember it all perfectly, wanna hear?

Mario: Sure....Wait, why'd I choose Sure?!

Luigi: Sweet, so, which one do you want to hear?

Mario: Start from the beginning.....Hey, who's choosing these replies for me?!

Luigi: OK, so, it's gonna be a tad long, so bear with me, OK? Well, you had just left the house, being all paranoid of your identity. I was a tad worried at first, but I decided on that you were fine. Then I opened my fan mail. It said I had a fan club at a place called the Rare Witch Project forums.

I had no idea what that was, so I went on outside to water the paper plants... Only to find out too late that paper plus water equals soggy paper... I panicked and ran inside to get an Ice block from the freezer. I placed the Ice Block on the paper, and the paper plant was even more messed up! I tell you, living in a world where everything's paper thin isn't as great as it sounds.

I frowned at the sight of our frozen, deformed paper plant... I then went out to buy another so you wouldn't get mad when you came back. Sadly, when I got back, the Ice Block melted, and the paper plant was all soggy again... I tried mopping up the watery mess, but forgot to put a Mafefe Brand Paper Weight on the new paper plant, so the wind blew it away.

I was really tired of trying to do all this, so I continued to mop up the soggy paper plant, then took a picture of another one of our paper plants and placed the picture where our old one was. I figured I could get away with that.

So, thinking of getting away, I decided to take a short stroll through Toad Town to calm my mind. On my way to the Southern Toad Town, I saw a... Hey, Bro., wake up, will ya?

Mario: ZzzzZzz... Uh huh, what? Yeah, I'm awake. I'm just closing my eyes so I can visualize it better?

Luigi: Oh, OK. So, anyway, on my way to Southern Toad Town, I saw a Buzzy Beetle with a green shell and a wrench as a Spike Top. He seemed familiar, so I approached him and greeted him. "Hey, it's you!" said the Green Buzzy Beetle, "You're the guy who ran away from me to get out of paying the debt you owe me!" I remembered who it was then.

It was Torque, the Buzzy Beetle from my past adventure with the Marvelous Compass Pieces! He started on how he's not gonna let me get away this time until I pay him that 5,000 coin debt from Circuit Break Island... So, he tagged along with me. He said he was willing to help as long as I pay him back at some point in our lives.

Then, something weird happened... Some voice said I gained a new ally and started explaining the various things Torque can do. Apparently, he can attach a wide array of tools onto his shell, which makes him very handy in fixing mechanical things. Too bad that doesn't involve fixing paper plants...

With a new partner to keep me company, I continued along with my walk. On the way, we noticed a Shy Guy holding a map... I greeted him, and he told me that his name was Sonny and that Merlon told him to, "Give a Green El Person a map of Dual Screened entertainment." He gave me the map, and went on his way, saying that he had to ask Merlon the next step towards saving the world.

Me and Torque looked at the...

Spiky Joe: Excuse me, but you're supposed to have your name last when using multiple people like that. You know, "Torque and I," not "Me and Torque."

Luigi: Er, right, sorry... So, Torque and I looked at the map in an attempt to see what it was mapping. It showed a picture of a shining DS Lite, and other kinds of numbered landmarks. The shining effects on the DS Lite must have meant it was magical. And the number one landmark was a Volcano on an island with Yoshies. The only place I could recall was Lavalava Island. So, we embarked on a trip to Lavalava Island to find Magical DS Pieces!

Me and To- I mean, Torque and I walked to the port of Toad Town to catch a boat to there. The ride cost us 200 coins, but Torque payed for all of it, but that made me owe him 100 more coins, since we were supposed to split it... Well, we got on and went off to start our new adventure!

Mario: ZzZzzzz... Uh whuh?

Torque: Yeah, this guy's not gonna pinch out of this debt. I'm sure he'll pay it... Eventually...

Luigi: Well, that's it for part 0, the Prologue. You want to continue on with the next part?

Mario: Yeah, I need more sleep.... ZzZzzzz...

Ultra: ...It's OK, we're enjoying it.

Spiky Joe: *Yawn* Yeah, it's very, uh... Interesting.... zzzz...

Ultra: Well, I like it, continue on.

Luigi: OK. So, the next part, Off to Lavalava Island. We arrived at Lavalava Island without any hassle. The place was very full of green, lush plants, and... Green. We walked along the beach and into a small village inhabited by Yoshies. They were all very Super Happy. Though, one of them was very Super Hungry, and thought of me as food! He pulled me into his mouth with that dreadful tongue! And that's not even the first time, either! One time when I was presenting Yoshi with a Tennis Trophy, he thought the trophy was a pineapple, and wound up eating me! It's a good thing he laid me out as an egg and not... something else!

Er, where was I? Oh yeah, I would've been swallowed if the Chieftain didn't help me out! About the Chieftain? Yeah, he actually was the guy who helped you save me and the stork when we were babies, Bro.

Mario: ZzzZzZzzzz... Nighty night....

Luigi: I know, cool, right? So, he told me about the Ravens having a Piece of a DS Lite, and that I could find them by, uh... Climbing a really tall tree. Er, and I climbed it with ease, yeah! It was too easy. A piece of cake!

So, I got to the top and confronted the Ravens. Raphael the Raven was the one who had it. He needed to make sure I wasn't a nobody-treasure-hoarder-greedy-guy, so he fought me. Uh.... I...Uhm... And......He had...... And I won! I beat Raphael the Raven. He, uhm, recognized my talent and saw the hero within and gave me the DS Piece!

I then said my good-byes and went off back to Toad Town. On the ride back, Torque and I examined the map once more to see the next location of the DS Piece. It looked to be as a town covered in twilight. I remembered you, Bro., talking about Twilight Town being covered in twilight. You said it was under Rogueport and the pipe required something with your name on it to get in.

So, I asked the 1st Mate of the boat to give me a sticker to put on the front of my shirt. He gave me a, "Hello, my name is..." sticker, and slapped it on there... But, he forgot to wait for me to put my name on it, so I had to replace Torque's Wrench with a pencil and have him write my name on the sticker.

The end result was a little sloppy, but it got the job done. I then had to do the same with Torque, and his shell wasn't all that smooth, so it came out a little jagged. But, it did the justus. Er, I mean, justice...

Torque: Yeah, about the battle with Raphael? He didn't win, he actually lost... He got the DS Piece out of pure pity.

Luigi: Uh, ahem, yeah... So, that's it for part 1, Off to Lavalava Island. Wanna continue on?

Mario: ZZzZZzzz... Oh wut? Oh, yeah, I need more sleppp...... ZzzZz.....

Spiky Joe: ZzZzzzzz........

Ultra: Yeah, it's very intriguing. But, uh, you should wait until next episode, we're getting awfully close to 10,000 characters.

Luigi: Alrighty. I can wait.

END

What a talker, huh?


	15. Chapter 15: Luigi's Tiring Story Part 2

_**Episode 15**_

Mario and Spiky Joe are huddled together, sleeping like a Mustachioed baby and a red shelled bug huddling together for warmth while sleeping. Ultra is eagerly waiting for Luigi to continue his story, and occasionally stops Mario from doing anything embarrassing.

Luigi: What? ...Oh, yeah, so next part: Twilight Trouble. Me and To- Gr, I mean, Torque and I went down the pipe to Twilight Town. Upon our arrival, we saw an unexpected site...

You were right, Bro., it was covered in Twilight... The book and movie, Twilight! I'm sorry to you fans, but I really didn't enjoy the book or movie. It's a nice concept 'n' all, but I just can't get into it.

As I looked at it, I had a sort of frownie face on. One of the villagers saw me and asked why I was frownie faced. I told him that I didn't exactly like how the town was covered with posters, stands, balloons, and all other sorts of Twilight merchandise. He asked why and I told him that it doesn't look suitable for one who is not a fan. He said, "Why? Are you not a fan?"

And I replied that I was not a fan, that I did not really like the book. Especially that little birth sequence part, that disgusted me. And, uh, well... He got angry, and yelled a word, and other villagers came in the scene, and, uh... They started attacking me, Bro.! All I said was I didn't like it, and I was getting attacked!

Torque: You said more than that, Luigi...

Luigi: Uuuuhhh... Well... Yeah, but.... Well, I was getting chased around town and wound up running into the forest. The angry fans stopped chasing me, and I continued on through the forest.

Boy, I'll say, that forest was creepy. There were cute Dayzees in there, but they were enemies, so I had to fight them. I can't tell you how many times I fell asleep like you are doing now.

Mario: Zzzz... Rotisserie...

Luigi: Yeah, weird, huh? Even creepier was I kept hearing monsters, and I kept thinking one was gonna jump out, but none did. I almost jumped out of my overalls when I fell down a hole in the ground! But, it wasn't all bad. There was a Magical DS Piece in that hole, and another one was behind a black bush.

About that bush, it was all weird... I poked it, and it felt kinda furry and soft... And it grumbled when l did... And it was snoring, which is weird, because bushes don't normally snore... Unless it's one of those Black Sleeping Bushes...... No, l didn't make that up!

So, then there was this mansion. Boy, me and mansions, gotta love it... X( Inside there was this statue of a Magical DS Piece, but there were broken parts of the statue all over the ground near it... But, the statue looked perfectly intact... Maybe the sculptor didn't clean up after himself?

Oh, and there was a Boo there, too... Rhyme..... Or, well, maybe another Boo, or two thousand... See, l found a chest. I opened it, and a whole lot of Boos flew out. The last one asked me how many came out, and I guessed 2,000... He said I was wrong, and dropped a hammer on my head! The hammer was made of some iron thing, so it really hurt, Bro.! Actually, it kinda looks like the one your Golden Hammer Bro. keeps eying...

Ultra: Huh? What? I don't wanna steal his hammer?

Luigi: Oh, OK, just saying. So, anyway-

Ultra: Can I have your hammer?

Luigi: ...Uh... About that.... When I got to the top of that mansion and saw the bell, I thought, "Oh, cool, a bell! Hm, I'm sure it wouldn't hurt if I banged it one little time." So, I charged up my hammer, and gave one good whack on the bell. I kinda hit it a tad too hard and, um... It kinda span all round and was ringing a whole bunch of times, and lastly banged into Torque and I and we fell out of the mansion! Luckily, we landed on another Black Sleeping Bush, but I couldn't find the hammer! I lost it!

That Boo who gave me the hammer said, "Hey, hey, _HEY_! You cracked the bell! And lost the HAMMAWHACK 2005! You owe me 8,000 coins total for that antique stuff!"

I then replied with, "Oh, now the debt I'm in is over 9,000!!!" I really have money troubles, huh, Bro.? *sigh* So, I got off the Black Bush, which was then growling loudly. I had no idea what was going on with these Black Bushes, snoring, growling, and being furry. But now that I think about it, it might have been a Tired Dog...

Hmmm.............. Oh, what? Yeah, so we got out of the forest, and when we got back to Twilight Town, the place was inhabited by pigs! That was really weird, they were all, "Oink oink!" and stuff! Then, the pigs started attacking me, so I got out of there as quick as possible.

When we got out of the pipe, we were safe. So, we checked the next location of the Magical DS Piece... Oh yeah, and l forgot to mention that we found another in the bell room, for your information. Yeah, so we had all but one now. We checked and saw that the next location was a figure-8 road. Torque recognized it immediately. It was Circuit Break Island! We were gonna have to go back there!

Torque said that he hopes I don't wreck the car again... Yeah... Well, that's it for Part 2, Twilight Trouble. You think we got enough time for another?

Ultra: Hm, 5,000 characters so far seems iffy if we can fit another... Let's try it, 'K?

Luigi: Okey-dokey, then. Part 3, Broken Circuits! We got on a boat and went back to Circuit Break Island, where the karts are hot, and the smoke is lung blackening. We entered ourselves in and were recognized instantly. Everyone started eying us, probably thinking if I'll mess up again... Erm...

So, when they showed the trophy, lucky day, it was a Magical DS Piece! Game Developer's Convenience sure does help a lot, huh, Bro.? So, we knew we had to win.

Torque wasn't sure on who he should let drive. He didn't want me to race, he thought I'd crash. I insisted that I could do it right without any crashing of the vehicle I'm riding. He agreed and let me race. He wasn't worried about the vehicle, he could build one in no time.

So, some hours passed, and he got the vehicle ready! He called it the Big Green 02, based off of the capabilities of the first, but significantly enhanced to include better handling. The race was starting soon, so we got it to our starting position. I strapped myself in and was ready to do good!

3,2,1, and it started! The race was great! I started out in last place, but I quickly gained on the pack! Zoom! Past the Little Shooter! Zoom! Past the Masher Mon03! Zoom! Past the Infernos Speeder! Zoom! Past the... Uh, I forget the name, but it was blue and was number 07... Anyway, I zoomed into first, dodging all the missiles, rockets, and bullets flying my way! It was like playing Vigilant 8, but it was a race, and not a game! Well, it kinda was a game, but it's more so called a sport.

Well, continuing, I finished in first place! And I, uh, didn't crash once! Nope no damage, yeah!

Torque: OK, hold up... He's not telling you it right. Let me... When he "insisted" on letting him drive, he was down on his legs and begging again. Man, I'm so soft on beggars, so I had to let him drive.

When he started the race, he peeled out, so that's why he started in last. He didn't crash the first second, that's good, but he only got in first because the other racers got distracted on the Infernos Speeder. That guy got on all the racers' nerves, and made them decide to stop racing and have the Infernos Speeder retire, then continue the race.

Luigi ignored all the hoopla, and miraculously avoided all the explosions and stuff. If it weren't for that Infernos Speeder distracting everyone, Luigi would've lost, I'm sure. But, a win's a win, so Luigi did finish first, but of course, he got all happy and starting waving his hands at the crowd, but he wasn't paying attention to where he was driving, so he crashed into a tree.

Clichéd, yes, but it happened. The damage wasn't as bad as last time, so it was only a 1,900 coin fine. He couldn't pay, of course, so he's in 15,000 coins of debt total so far. Augh...

Luigi: ....Er, yeah.... So, we got the Marvelous Compass Piece and... Oops, heh, I mean... So, we got the Magical DS Piece as reward for the win. When we were leaving, we saw some sort of bird with yellow attire smiling at us, then disappearing behind a building. The first thing I thought of was, "G-Bird."

Now, we're trying to find someone to decipher the text on this map, so we can correctly reassemble the Magical DS.

Well, that's it for Part 3, Broken Circuits. And that's all I have for stories now.

Mario: ZzZzzZzzz... uh, do... Oh?

Mario awakens and stands up.

Mario: Yes, quite a riveting story you got there, Wee Gee. I'm sure it'll help on our sleep. So...

Mario kicks Spiky Joe to wake him up.

Spiky Joe: 14/15 HP

Mario: Let's go off to Russ T. so we can decipher our own map, yes?

Luigi: Oh yeah, Russ T.! He can decipher my map, too! But, you probably need it more now, so me 'n' Torque-

Spiky Joe: "Torque and I."

Luigi: D'ooohh, Torque and I... are gonna go see what's up at Koopa Village. The radio said there's a spokesperson there giving out prizes for listeners.

Luigi walks off to the east exit of Toad Town, off to Pleasant Path.

Mario and his crew walk off to the west to see Russ.

END


	16. Chapter 16: Plot has Thickened!

_**Episode 16**_

Mario, Spiky Joe, Ultra, and, uh, the Koopinator all enter the house of Russ T. Of course, that was hard, as Mario tried to cram his way through while Spiky Joe was already entering. Impatience...

Mario: Ow! Watch where you point that spike, Spiky!

Spiky Joe: What? You're the- Oh, nevermind...

Russ: Oh, hello there. You have great timing, see, I just finished this here book, and it details-

Mario: Woo hoo, Man, but we got all the GBA Pieces!

Russ: Really?! Splendid! I'll take the map and pieces, please, thank you. Now, I'll just follow the instructions detailed on the map...

Russ reads over the map's instructions section and... Don't ask why a map has instructions... And puts together the Magical GBA.

Russ: And that's that! Anything's easy with proper instructions!

Russ hands Mario the GBA, and a bag full of the old GBA games Russ used to play.

Russ: I used these games to create special referential books. I have no need for them now, so you may take them and play them. I ensure, they all are in perfect condition!

Mario and his gang thanks Russ and walk outside to play their games. And they gamed happily ever after.... Until Mario realized that they don't make GBA stuff anymore... Then, he got all angry and went home, leaving Spiky Joe, Ultra, and the Koopinator to play the games.

THE END

Oh, oops, sorry, nevermind, I'm reading from the wrong book... :|

Er, let me try again...

* * *

Just after Russ fixed the GBA, the GBA started to glow a purple colour... It floated out of Russ's hands and stopped at the center of the room... The purple glow grew bigger and sprouted a purple leaf out of the GBA. The leaf flew out of the GBA, causing the handheld system to fall to the floor...

Out of the stem of the purple leaf, a purple, helm shaped head grew out. The head then grew a rather fat body, and stubby arms, but with stylish gold finger rings. :D There were no legs, the bottom of his body ended off in a ghostly tail, which constantly wagged to keep the ghoul amidst the air.

Mario: ZOMG, Pl0t Twist!!!!!

Purple Ghostie: Omnonyum... Oh? Ah! Yawn! I have been asleep for a whole 3 years, 4 days, 7 hours, 15 minutes, and 30 seconds! Man, I had some dream! All about some red mustache dude and how he wanted to stop me from taking over the world! Ha! Some craaazy dream! ......Buwhuh?! Ah! It's him, the mustache dude!

Mario: I have a name, y'know? And it's Mario, y'know?

Purple Ghostie: ...Oh ship! Uhm, you wouldn't want to stop me from taking over the world, would you?

Mario: Depends... Can I get my own rules to live by?

Spiky Joe: MARIO!!!

Mario: Oops, I mean, no way! I beat up evil guys like that for breakfast!

Purple Ghostie: Ah, well then I, Ashi Boke, will not be stopped by a foolish red cap like you! Now don't follow me, kay? Tee...

The evil, purple ghoul vanishes from their sight, leaving the heroes, book worm, and warrior in silence, until someone breaks the silence.

Ultra: Uhm, what was that? Was that a bad guy?

Russ: I...think he was the purple cloud the map mentioned...

Mario: Huh? You mean you put together that death-trap, knowing this would happen?!

Russ: I thought the purple cloud was gonna be a Sierra Mist, or something...

Mario's party facepalms...

Spiky Joe: Now it's not for fun anymore... Now we gotta venture to stop an evil being... Awesome!

Ultra: Yeah, but how are we gonna beat him? In all the Paper Mario games, you have to find 8 or 7 power things, and combine their power to defeat the final boss.

Russ: And that is true for this game. The map just formed some new text on it... "Thou hast verily caused doom for thy world. If thee wish to redeem thyself, thee shalt follow teh new map, and collect teh Colour Stars."

Ultra: Colour Stars? You mean that guy wants to turn the whole world greyscale?

Russ: Hm, actually, more like Violet-scale. He seems to like violet. Well, I'll give you the map now. As much as I like having an important role in the story, you guys really should have the map instead. I mean, it's not _that_ hard to understand.

Russ hands Mario the map, which has magically changed to detail the locations of the Colour Stars. Russ sees the GBA on the floor, still intact. He picks it up and takes out a small white bag of GBA games.

Russ: Oh, and you should take this, too. You might find some power ups in them.

Mario: No way, what if some other weirdo villain comes out?!

Russ: The evil has been expelled now, I'm sure. You can still use it as a normal GBA that puts you inside the game.

Spiky Joe: ...Uhm, sure, how normal...

Mario received the Magical GBA and a bag of GBA games from Russ!

Russ: Now hurry off now, who knows when Ashi Boke will kill all the colours!

As soon as Mario and co. exit the house, Toad Town's colours all vanish and get engulfed by gray, black, and white. The only normal colour that wasn't affected was violet...

Spiky Joe: I guess this Ashi Boke is a little _Russ T._ on his magic talent, huh?

Mario: Aw, man, that was terrible! Boooo!

Spiky Joe: …...

Mario: So, let's check this map... Hm... The Red Coloured Star is located in a Block Building... Uh, I think it's called a Block Fort, or something?

Ultra: Oh, you mean like in Mario Kart 64?

Mario: Uh, maybe?

Spiky Joe: Sweet, this will definitely result in an interesting Boss Battle for sure!

Koopinator: Mm hmm, yes, very good.

Mario: Are you gonna do anything, Mr. Koopinator? Or, are you just gonna follow us?

Koopinator: Nah, I'm good with being a background character who cheers you on, no harm in that.

Mario slowly turns away from the Koopinator and begins walking down the greyscaled Toad Town road.

Spiky Joe: Mustache, do you even know where you're going?

Mario: Yes, for once, I do.

Spiky Joe: =O

Mario continues walking, and ignores all the people freaking out about the colours. Mario arrives at his destination, the Toad Town Port, and pays 200 coins to the ferryman to sail them to Block City.

What awaits our heroes at Block City? Why is Ashi Bake so bad at magic now? Where did I come up with Ashi Bake? Maybe you'll find out next time, on Spiky Joe and the Mustache!

END

Oh yeah, and it's pronounced, "Ah-Shee-Bah-Kay."


	17. Chapter 17: Blah Blah Black Blocks

_**Episode 17**_

Our heroes arrive at Block City via the boat they took. The bridge to the city seemed to have been made out of blocks. The buildings were made out of, you guessed it, blocks! The city's walkway had a checkered pattern on them, and led into a round-about road, circling a water fountain...made out of blocks. Yes, the water was, too. But, keep in mind, that all the colours are in greyscale, except the colour Violet.

Mario: Oh boy! I can't wait to... See what the citizens look like... Around here!

Spiky Joe: Mustache, please avoid the YouTube Poop fashion speech...

Ultra: Hey, wait, aren't all the colours gone? If so, why's that block building over there, red?

Ultra points to a large hill in the background to the west with a red block towering slightly over a brick wall on the top of it.

Mario: Looks like..... That house looks like the one from Monopoly!

Spiky Joe: You play that?

Mario: It must be a Monopoly Tourney up there! We must go now!

Ultra: It doesn't really look like the game piece... It looks like a big block. It doesn't even look like the block houses here...

Mario: Well, red house in gray world means Red Colour Star?

Spiky Joe: Hey, Mustache is on a role! He's actually being smart!

Mario: .......

Mario and his partners follow the block road to the west. They find some enemies along the road, which are made of blocks too... After about a minute or two of walking through the road, Mario says...

Mario: You know, this place seems familiar...I swear I've been here before...

Spiky Joe and Ultra didn't seem to notice him say that, making Mario put on an angry face... After about 78 Star Points of enemies, Mario's ranking rose to 7, and decided to up his BP.

30/30 HP

10/10 FP

12/12 BP

At the end of the road, they arrived at a large, gray, brick wall with a small voice box attached to it.

Mario: Oh, finally, I've been needing one of these!

Mario walks up to the voice box...

Mario: Hoo, OK, I got 100 coins for you, and you got many fast food items for me... What fast food items, preferably french fries and Shroom Steak Burgers, could I obtain with these 100 coins?

Voice Box: Huh? What? Ashi? Is that you? You know we don't sell food here... Even if we did, you'd get them for free, 'cause you're the boss, y'know? I do have some mushrooms, if you want them. Here, I'll open the door. There should be an item box with a mushroom inside it right at the entrance. Over and out.

With that, part of the brick wall fades away, and Mario and co. walk through the passageway. As they enter, the brick wall fades back in... The item box is right in front of Mario. He reaches into it and pulls out a Mega Mushroom! Mario puts the Mega Mushroom into the Items Pocket.

Mario: Oh yeah... I remember now... This is... The Block Fort!

??: Hey, Ashi, you shouldn't yell out the obvious!

A Red Block humanoid sort of thing, about Mario's size, walks up to Mario and co.

Mario: Who are you, young lady?

Chou: Uhm, I'm Chou, remember, Ashi? I'm the... Hey... Wait! You're not Ashi! Mario is your name! I can't believe I fell for your little Ashi impersonation! I would never have noticed if you didn't confuse my gender!

Jim: .............

Chou: OK, you, M Cap! Prepare for battle... A Balloon Battle!

Mario: Was that jim again?

Chou: Yes, a Balloon Battle! Get your Kart ready! We play MK64 rules!

Spiky Joe: I knew this'd be an interesting battle!

* * *

Mario and Chou have gotten their karts ready for their Balloon Battle. Since it's the MK64 rules, they both have the standard karts, with their main colour... But that doesn't make a difference, with the world being all greyscale...

Chou: OK, so you need a refreshment on the rules?

Mario: No, I've done this before.

Chou: OK then, this is MK64 rules... That means only red shells, green shells, bananas, fake boxes, and Stars. That also means shells don't break until they hit an item or racer.

Mario: _

Chou: So, you need a crash course, or somethin'?

Mario: .........Yes.

Chou: Confident, huh? OK, then, let's start! Just remember: I'm gonna be the one to take you out!

Mario: (Man, is it opposite day?)

Chou: You! Spiky Shellos! Count it down!

Spiky Joe: Uh.... Go, 1, 2.... _**3!!!!**_

Chou: Hey, no counting backwards, nub!

Spiky Joe: l thought it was opposite day.... *sigh* 3, 2, 1, _**GO!!!!**_

TO BE CONTINUED

Trivia: The episode's title is a reference to that "Bah Bah, Black Sheep" thing.


	18. Chapter 18: Bloons Kartopia Battalia

_**Episode 18**_

Spiky Joe: 3,2,1..._**GO!!!!**_

The countdown has finished and Mario and Chou start their race! They both boost towards the center, straight at each other! Oddly enough, they both weigh the same, so upon smacking into each other, they both spin out and lose 1 balloon.

Ultra: That's not how you're supposed to Mario-cide!

Spiky Joe: But if they keep doing that, whoever has higher controller priority will win... Mario's Player 1, so he'd win, right?

Mario shrugs off the hit and continues on to the end of the road, collects an item box, and turns to the right. He receives a Red Shell and goes up the blue block structure.

He readies his Red Shell as he rides up to the top of the blue block structure. Mario notices Chou riding along the road below him and fires his Red Shell at Chou. Chou turns a corner and avoids the attack.

Mario wasn't watching where he was going and drove off the bridge! He landed on the red block structure then turned to the right so he can get back on the top of the structures. As Mario turns the corner after grabbing the item box, Chou turns around the other corner fires a Green Shell at Mario! Mario quickly gets out his item and drops it behind him. It wound up being a lone banana.

Mario travels up to the top of the red block structure with Chou following behind. Mario turns to the left bridge, back towards the blue block structure. He grabs the item box from the blue block structure and readies the item from it, which was a fake item box.

As soon as Mario sees what he got, he pulls the breaks and drops the fake item box right on Chou. As Chou flies straight up into the air, Mario speeds back up, heading towards the green block structure. He grabs the item box and pulls a 180° turn to go back to Chou. Mario receives a Green Shell and fires it immediately at Chou. Chou tries to fire his Red Shell to block, but it didn't come out in time.

Chou gets smacked by the Green Shell and falls off the bridge.

Chou: Nooooooooeeesssss!!!!!!!

Mario stops at where he hit Chou, his kart stands on its hind tires, and Mario rises his hand in the air in triumph.

* * *

Mario, his teammates, Koopinator, and Chou gather outside the Block Fort's entrance.

Chou: Blaaargh! I can't believe I lost! Gah... I should've made it a 2 out of 3..... OK, here... Take the Red Star and get outta here...

The Red Colour Star rises from behind a bush and floats towards Mario. It spins around him and falls into his open hands. Mario holds it high in the air.

Mario got the Red Colour Star! All Red colours are now restored to the world!

And as such, all the world's Red colours are restored! Now the only colours showing are the neutrals, Violet, and Red, by the way.

Chou: Er... Hey, is that a Red Berry?

Chou walks over to a tree and picks a red berry that was growing on the tip of a branch.

Chou: Duuude, l love these things! I never knew they grew here until all the red came back... Uh.... Gee, l guess I can't tell what colour a berry is if there are no colours.... So, uh....

Mario: Heh, I think we gained a new ally. ^_^

Chou: Uh... Well, thanks, l guess, heh. So, uh, if you, like, need something, l could help you out.

Mario: I won!

Spiky Joe: Alright. Mario, you think you're RED-y to go back to Toad Town?

Mario: Aw, boo, stop doing that!

Spiky Joe: What? You don't think it's punny?

Mario: La la la, not listening, la la!

Ultra rolls his eyes as he, Spiky Joe, Mario, and Koopinator walk back down the path to the port. As they board there ship, Mario plugs his ears with his gloves as Spiky Joe makes more puns. Hearing nothing but silence, Mario gets out the map and examines it.

Ultra: Oh yeah, what's the next location of the colour star?

Mario: ..............

Spiky Joe: He can't hear us, even though we are right HEAR. XD

Ultra: Uh, man, I don't have any gloves...

Mario: Ah, now we are at Orange! And the Orange Star is at a castle with a big ugly face on it. It looks to be surrounded by lava, it seems.

Spiky Joe: Ugly face? What ugly face?

Mario: ..............

Spiky Joe: Oh, for laughing out loud...

Spiky Joe yanks Mario's gloves out of his ear.

Spiky Joe: What face is ugly?

Mario: ....Yours.

Ultra: OoBurns!

Mario: Nah, but really not really, but actually is really, I mean Bowser's face. Bowser has the Orange Star.

Spiky Joe: Heh, he got downgraded to a 2nd Boss!

Koopinator: ......

Ultra: Hm? Hey, Koopinator, you say something?

Koopinator: Noo...

Mario: Ignore him, he's the gallery of peanuts eaters...

Spiky Joe: Woah, _Peanuts_ eaters?! I like those comics!

Mario: Oops, I made a typo...

The boat ships drifts off to the horizon, to Toad Town, to home, to the item shop...

Mario: Gotta gets me some grapes.

END


	19. Chapter 19: Storm the Kastle of Koopa

_**Episode 19**_

Mario and the gang walk out of the Item Shop, but Mario is upset, as Item Shops don't sell grapes.

Mario: Really wanted me some grapes...

Spiky Joe: Now now, Mustache, we can just go berry picking one day. But right now, we need to find Bowser's Keep.

Mario: Hey, wait...

Mario takes out the Magical GBA, pops in Pokemon Ruby, and turns it on. He is then warped inside the GBA and is in the game itself!

Spiky Joe: O.o Why'd he do that?!

Ultra: I think he's looking for an Oran Berry in there....

Spiky Joe: Are Oran Berries even in that one? And are Orans even Grape-like?

Ultra: Well I don't know, I haven't, like, played it for awhile...

Spiky Joe: So, uh, you can carry the GBA, right? I got no hands...

Ultra: Uh, yeah...

Ultra picks up the Magical GBA as he asks,

Ultra: So, where is Bowser's Keep? The games didn't exactly make note of it.

Koopinator: That's where I come in.

Spiky Joe: Wait, what's that supposed to mean? You were in Bowser's Koop Troop before?

Koopinator: Well, it was awhile ago... But I do remember where to find it. Come. Let's go.

Koopinator leads Spiky Joe and Ultra to Bowser's Keep. What about Mario? Well...

* * *

(The GBA is Magical, so the games are in full colour)

Mario has landed in front of a building with a red roof and looks around the town he's in.

Mario: Oh, I think some grapes are around here.

Mario walks north and turns west to the exit of the town, but is stopped by a human person.

Bob: Hiya! Are you maybe... A rookie TRAINER?

Mario: Rookie?

Bob: Do you know what POKéMON TRAINERS do when they reach a new town?

Mario: I'm not a-

Bob: They first check what kind of GYM is in the town.

Bob then pulls Mario across the ground to the front of an orange-ish roofed building.

Bob: See? This is PETALBURG CITY's GYM.

Mario: This don't look like Petalburg... Where are all the Koopas and that game obsessed Toad?

Bob: This is the GYM's sign. Look for it whenever you're looking for a GYM.

Bob then walks back to the west side exit of Petalburg.

Mario: What? Hey, I'm not going to a gym!

Mario walks back to the west side exit, but is stopped by Bob...

Bob: Hiya! Are you maybe... A rookie TRAINER?

Mario: Hey, this game can't be that lazily programmed!

Bob: Do you know what POKéMON TRAINERS do when they reach a new town?

Mario: You already told me!

Bob: They first check what kind of GYM is in the town.

Mario: Wait, I wasn't-

Bob drags Mario over to the gym again.

Mario: Shtoopeed!

Bob: See? This is PETALBURG CITY's GYM.

Mario: DO NOT WANT!

Bob: This is the GYM's sign. Look for it whenever you're looking for a GYM.

Bob then walks back to the west side exit of Petalburg.

Mario: I just want me grapes!

Mario runs back to the west side exit only to be stopped by the Bob person again.

Mario: Nuuuu!

Bob: Hiya! Are you maybe... A rookie TRAINER?

Mario: No, I am a 707411Y 1337 7R41N3R!

Bob: Do you know what POKéMON TRAINERS do when they reach a new town?

Mario: Oh forget grapes, then! Root/system/power off!

Mario somehow turns the GBA off and pops out of the GBA. He finds himself at a dark, castle-like hallway with Spiky Joe, Ultra, and Koopinator.

Mario: No grapes...

Ultra: Oh, hi, Mario. Koopinator just got us into Bowser's Keep by pretending he was taking us to the jail.

Mario: Oh, wonderful, then! I'm sure I can find my way through here, right?

Koopinator: Yes. But-

Mario: Right-o, down the hall!

Mario leads his party through the castle, solving all the puzzles, beating all the enemies, jumping Podoboo sticks, and anything else one does to get through a castle. After about 84 Star Points of enemies, Mario reaches a large, red door.

Spiky Joe: Hm, I wonder where this goes...

Ultra: Possibly to a floodgate blocking lava from overflowing?

Koopinator facepalms...

Mario: Wait, this ain't MediEvil! Besides, how can you make a floodgate to stop lava anyway? Really...

Spiky Joe: Well, if its melting point is higher than that of lava's, then l guess...

Mario: No! This is Mario! And according to the DSU Book of Platforming Clichés, big, red doors always lead to the final boss! Or in this case, the Boss of Chapter 2...

Mario feigns gallantry and opens the door, revealing Bowser sitting on his throne, talking with Kammy Koopa, his "right-hand woman."

Bowser: But, I wanna go cruise around in the Koopa Clown Car and see what's up with the colours!

Kammy: I know, Your Grunginess, but you need to sit on your throne for 4 hours each day to look king-like.

Bowser: But that's boring!

Kammy: These are nice bricks I had put in the walls, aren't they?

Bowser: Stay focused!

Kammy: Focused to what?

Mario: Focused to Bowser's wanting of flying in the Koopa Clown Car.

Kammy: Oh yeah, thanks. So, no, Sire, you cannot go flying around until you sit on your throne for 2 more hours.

Bowser: You said 3 hours an hour ago!

Kammy: And World 3-1 is empty, so it's 2 hours now.

Bowser: Grumble.... What about that weird **star** that flew out of the sky a few hours ago?

Kammy: That's safe in the Library, a place no one ever goes to! Well, except for the guards...

Bowser: Oh, OK... Just wanna make sure no one tries stealing it... You know, like Mario, or somebody.

Kammy: Oh, l don't think he'll know about that. I mean, he hates books. He would never to think to look there!

Mario: XD

Mario silently walks out of Bowser's Throne Room and closes the door, undetected.

Spiky Joe: Wow, how easy! Who would've thought they were both so blind?

Mario: Blah blah, but where is the Library?

Koopinator: I do believe that sign points to a door that leads to it.

Koopinator points to said sign.

Mario: :0 How long's that been there?

Mario walks to the sign and follows to where it points, a normal, gray door. He opens it and reveals a room filled with books upon books, shelved away in... Uh, shelves.

Mario: .........tl;dr

Spiky Joe: You don't need to read, Mustache, you just gotta look for anything related to a Colour Star.

Mario: Still, too many books... Don't wanna do...

Koopinator: We best get started.... If I remember correctly, the guards come to check here in about 5 minutes.

Ultra: Oh boy, we better get searching...

Mario, Spiky Joe, Ultra, and Koopinator frantically search the Library for an Orange Colour Star. Their 5 minutes will be as a week to you readers, as to how I update this.

END


	20. Chapter 20: Bowser Boss Battle

_**Episode 20**_

Spiky Joe: Dude! I can't find anything about the star!

Ultra: Keep looking, it's in here somewhere!

Koopinator: We don't have much time, the guards are coming.

Mario: ..................

The whole gang is searching frantically for the Orange Colour Star supposedly hidden in the library. Mario is throwing every book on the shelves onto the floor behind him to see if the star is behind one. Spiky Joe is squeezing through the back side of the shelves to ensure the star isn't behind there. Ultra is inspecting the insides of all the books, making sure every page is looked at carefully to find the star. Koopinator is keeping watch at the door to warn the heroes for when the guards come.

Mario: OH NOOOOOO!!!

Everyone stops and runs to Mario as he shrieks out in terror.

Spiky Joe: W-What is it, Mustache?!

Mario: Twuh-Twuh-Twuh- Twilight! They have the book series of Twilight!!!

Koopinator: ................

Spiky Joe: Oh........ I thought you saw a bug, or somethin'...

Just then, they hear the door to the library slam shut.

Ultra: Huh? Did the wind close the door for you, Koopinator?

Koopinator: No. I closed the door before running over here. I think we may have been discovered. Quick, continue searching for that star!

The heroes quickly resume their searching of the entire room. But they are shortly interrupted by knocking on the door.

Mario: Occupied!

???: What? You better not be using the library as the bathroom!

The door swings open and Bowser and Kammy Koopa see Mario and his party around a mess of books on the floor.

Kammy: Hey! It took me a long time to organize those books!

Bowser: (Haw haw!)

Kammy: Hm? Your Grumpiness, you seem like you want to say something...

Bowser: Er, yeah, l wanted to say, MARIO! What are you doing here?!

Mario: Nothing really.

Bowser: So you tear up my library for no reason?! What kind of reason is that?!

Mario: I never said that...

Bowser: Gr, I'm gonna have to beat you for this!

Koopinator: Wait. Hold on. The tutorial for me never played.

Koopinator joined your party! He can fool Bowser's crew as he technically never quit. But seeing what's going on now, it looks like that won't help anymore. In battle, he can damage foes who directly attack him from above with his spiked helmet, and can attack all enemies with his Shell Toss!

Mario: Yeah, woo, OK, now can we battle?

Spiky Joe: We actually didn't do me yet...

Spiky Joe joins your party! On the field, he can spin inside his shell, then have Mario kick him to hit Switch Blocks from across gaps! During battles he can attack all enemies with a Shell Toss! Don't forget, his Spike Top can be dangerous to foes who try direct attacks from above.

Spiky Joe: Say, did we do Ultra yet?

Mario: Yes we did! Now no more tutorial!

Bowser and its cohort attack!

Mario sends out Koopinator to fight by his side!

Mario: 30/30 HP

Koopinator: 25/25 HP

Bowser: 40/40 HP

Kammy: 25/25 HP

Mario/Hammer/Normal Bounce/ Mario stomps Kammy! 1+1 damage! Kammy fell off her broom!

Koopinator/Attack/Quick Dash/ Koopinator rushes towards Bowser with spike helmet forward! 2 damage!

Bowser/Attack/ Bowser swipes his claw at Mario! 2 damage!

Kammy/Attack/ Kammy shoots deadly circles, triangles, and squares at Mario! Mario guards to receive 1 damage!

Mario: 27/30 HP

Koopinator: 25/25 HP

Bowser: 38/40 HP

Kammy: 23/25 HP

Mario/Hammer/Power Smash/ Mario uses FP to deal massive damage! 3 damage to Bowser!

Koopinator/Attack/Quick Dash/ Koopinator dashes towards Bowser again! 2 damage!

Bowser/Attack/ Bowser jumps on Mario! Mario Superguards to counter the attack! 1 damage to Bowser!

Kammy/Attack/ Kammy fires more deadly shapes at Koopinator! Guarding negated the damage!

Mario: 27/30 HP

Koopinator: 25/25 HP

Bowser: 32/40 HP

Kammy: 23/25 HP

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario swings at Bowser! 1 damage!

Koopinator/Attack/Shell Toss/ Koopinator spins inside his shell and shoots himself through Bowser and Kammy! 2 damage to Bowser, 3 to Kammy!

Bowser/Attack/ Bowser breathes out fire at Mario and Koopinator! 2 damage to Mario, 1 damage to Koopinator!

Kammy/Attack/ Kammy fires a softening magic attack towards Koopinator! Koopinator's defense went down by 1!

Mario: 25/30 HP

Koopinator: 24/25 HP

Bowser: 29/40 HP

Kammy: 21/25 HP

Mario/Jump/Power Bounce/ Mario jumps on Kammy endlessly until he misses an Action Command! Wow, he's usually bad at Action Commands! 14 damage!

Koopinator/Attack/Quick Dash/ More dashing at Bowser! 2 damage!

Bowser/Attack/ Bowser bites Mario! 3 damage! Mario is also poisoned.

Kammy/Attack/ Kammy shoots the deadly shapes at Mario! 2 damage!

Mario: 20/30 HP

Koopinator: 24/25 HP

Bowser: e 27/40 HP

Kammy: e 7/25 HP

Mario suffered from his poison!

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario swings his hammer at Bowser! 1 damage!

Koopinator/Attack/Shell Toss/ Koopinator uses the last FP to attack both Bowser and Kammy! 2 damage to Bowser, 3 to Kammy!

Bowser/Attack/ Bowser swipes his claw at Mario! 3 damage!

Kammy/Attack/ Kammy shoots another blast of deadly shapes at Koopinator! 2 damage!

Mario: 14/30 HP

Koopinator: 22/25 HP

Bowser: 24/40 HP

Kammy: 4/25 HP

Mario takes another point of damage from his poison!

Mario/Item/Thunder/ Mario illogically spawns lightning to attack Bowser and Kammy! 4 damage to both!

Kammy fainted!

Koopinator/Attack/Quick Dash/ The move Koopinator's been doing for a most of the match... 2 damage!

Bowser/Attack/ Bowser breathes fire at Mario and Koopinator! 3 damage!

Mario: 11/30 HP

Koopinator: 19/25 HP

Bowser: 19/40 HP

Mario suffers from his poison!

Koopinator's softness wore off!

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario swings down his hammer on Bowser! 1 damage!

Koopinator/Item/Super Soda/ Koopinator gives Mario the drink! 5 FP revived and poison healed!

Bowser/Attack/ Bowser bites at Mario! Mario Guards to avoid poison! 2 damage!

Mario: 9/30 HP

Koopinator: 19/25 HP

Bowser: 18/40 HP

Mario/Hammer/Power Smash/ Mario uses a Powerful Smash on Bowser! 3 damage!

Koopinator/Attack/Quick Dash/ Koopinator charges at Bowser! 2 damage!

Bowser/Attack/ Bowser jumps on Koopinator! But jumping on spikes really hurt, so... Bowser takes 1 damage!

Mario: 9/30 HP

Koopinator: 19/25 HP

Bowser: 12/40 HP

Mario/Hammer/Power Smash/ Mario uses his last FP to deal damage again! 3 damage again!

Koopinator/Attack/Quick Dash/ Koopinator rushes at Bowser! 2 damage!

Bowser/Attack/ Bowser swipes his claw at Mario! Mario takes 3 damage!

Mario: 6/30 HP

Koopinator: 19/25 HP

Bowser: 7/40 HP

Mario: Oh, this is taking to long!

Mario/Cheat/God Mod/ Mario kills Bowser...

Bowser fainted!

* * *

Kammy: Aah! Don't worry, Your Dizziness, I'll get you to the Medical Shroom Center!

Bowser: Bleah....

Kammy drags Bowser out of the library and slams the door shut. As it shuts, the chandelier in the room shakes and drops an orange star on Mario's head.

Mario: 5/30 HP _**!**_

Mario: Ow, great, Danger again...

Spiky Joe: Hey, wait, that's the Orange Colour Star, Mustache!

Mario picks up the Orange Colour Star and... Mario got the Orange Colour Star! All the colours of orange are restored to the world!

Mario: Hoo..... Yea, we did it... So, now what?

Koopinator: Bowser might send reinforcements, so we should leave now.

Mario: Wait, I only have 5 HP!

Koopinator: Better find a Save Block...

END


	21. Chapter 21: Luigi's Tiring Story Part 3

NYAAH! I forgot to update this on Tuesday!!!! I completely forgot, sorry! DX

_**Episode 21**_

Mario got a Game Over because he forgot to heal his HP at the library and got ambushed by Bowser's Koop Troops. Sadly, he forgot to save, like, at all, so he had to start the game all over from the beginning. After many hours of skipping through text and reenacting all the events he passed, he got out of Bowser's Keep and into a Toad House's bed.

Toad House Manager: Did you sleep well? Now that your body and soul are refreshed, your travels will seems much easier.

Mario: Yes, now that I got my HP and FP refilled!

Ultra: So, what's the next location on the map?

Spiky Joe: Yeah! I hope it's something really fun and interesting!

Mario: Hmmm... It looks like a sort of islandish mountain, sorta... Indicated that it is brown, like chocolate...

Ultra: Super You World?

Mario: Wuh? Me?

Ultra: Yeah, isn't there a Chocolate Island in Dinosaur Land?

Mario: Ah, of course, just as I had planned! Hm, seems so! OK, to the Ferry!

Mario and his partners walk to the port once again. There, they meet a familiar green character.

Mario: Say, haven't I met you before?

Luigi: Uh, yeah, Bro. I'm your Bro.

Mario: Aw noo...

Luigi: Sooooo.... Wanna hear about what I've been up to?

Mario: ZZzzzZzz.....

Ultra: Sure thing, Luigi!

Luigi: Cool! So, where were we last time?

Ultra: Off to Koopa Village?

Luigi: Thanks. Yeah, so, me and, er.... Torque and I went to the radio gimmick at Koopa Village. That turned out to be a hoax. It was just a Bandit trying to snatch some loot. And we, uh............. And..... Yeah, beat him up for his bad deeds. It wasn't too hard at all, not like I got a Game Over because I missed an Action Command on a simple move at the start, nope.

Ahem, anyway, we went back to Toad Town and talked with Russ T. He deciphered the instructions on the map and put together the Magical DS. Oh, but you're not gonna believe this, Bro., a big, skinny yellow ghosty guy oozed out of the DS when it was put together! He said his name was Ashi Isai or something. He talked about spreading evil across the world by removing all the music from the world and replace it all with A Capella.

Russ T. said that he was some evil guy who likes A Capella so much, he's willing to replace all the background music in the game into vocals! But, apparently, he's a little Russ T. on his magic...

Spiky Joe: XD

Luigi: ...so he could only delete all the instruments except vocals, and vocals are hardly used in this game's music. That probably made Ashi Isai mad... I guess.

Well, either way, I get to go on an adventure to collect all the Rhythm Stars from other bad people! So, we noticed the map magically changed, so we got to see new locations to go to! The first one this time, was Diamond City. You know, the place Wario talked about once?

Wario: _!_

Luigi: Ahem, yeah... So, we talked to Wario about it and, uh, he brought us over there with no trouble, yeah. He didn't get angry at me for randomly invading his house or anything. So, when we got there, we were greeted by a whole buch of human people. It was kinda a bit crazy there.

Spiky Joe: Kinda a bit?

Luigi: Yeah, not really a bit, just a bit less than a bit. Anywho, we got to Diamond City and were, uhm, greeted with enthusiasm, yeah. We, uh...............*Mumble mumble*

Ultra: Hm? I didn't hear that, what happened?

Luigi: Oh, we just talked and got lead to the place we needed to go, that's all.

Luigi: Yeah, so we had to fight this evil stringy monster that used guitars and harps to attack. We, uh, got hurt, uh, a little, but we beat the monster easily, yeah.

Spiky Joe: You're being a little vague, you didn't mention where the monster was.

Luigi: It was in Diamond City, where else?

Spiky Joe: But _where_ in Diamond City?

Luigi: Ah, dunno, somewhere! In a house!

Luigi: Yeah, so, we said good-bye and stuff, and uhm... We didn't break any of 9-Volt's stuff. On the trip back to Toad Town, we checked the map again to see the next location of the star. It appeared to be a Fortress near a town of petals. Me 'n' Tor- Er, d'oh... Torque and I guessed it was around Petalburg.

Well, that's it for... Uh.... Diamondized Strings? Sure, that's good enough. I'm guessing we can stop here?

Spiky Joe: I think we should. You're being too vague right now, maybe you'll get better details if you rest awhile.

Luigi: I wasn't vague, I was just skipping the parts where I got in troubullaimeen the unimportant parts.

Ultra: Oh, now it makes sense....

Luigi: Uh....

Torque:

END


	22. Chapter 22: Luigi's Tiring Story Part 4

_**Episode 22**_

Luigi: OK, yea. So, what's it now? Hm? Luigi's Tiring Story? Number da four? Aw, it can't be that tiring.

Mario: ZzzzZZZz...

Luigi: OK, well, maybe a little...

Spiky Joe: ZzzzZzzZzz......

Luigi: I got at least one person listening, right?

Ultra: ZZzZzz..... Just kidding! I'm listening to you, man.

Luigi: Heh, OK, so... Where were we last? Diamond City? OK, next one is good, and I remember it better!

Lazlo: That's because I actually brainstormed for ideas for once!

Luigi: Wow... If that ain't the wall breaker... So, on to my story! We had just gotten the String Star from Diamond City and regained all the Stringy instruments used in the background music! In case you didn't notice, the vocals were already regained because of that Ashi Isai, y'know? I think I explained that already...y'know?

Ahem, anywho, Torque and I checked the map and saw that the next location of the Rhythm Star was in a fortress. The fortress seemed to have four Koopas with bandannas on their heads surrounding it. We didn't know a thing...

Ultra: Hey, wait. You said it was a fortress near a town of petals.

Luigi: Er, no l didn't.

Ultra: Uh, yeah you did.

Luigi: No.

Ultra: Stop lying, you did too!

Luigi: No, I did not too!

Ultra: Get away from them internets, I'm cuttin' 'em down!

Luigi: What?! No, man, nooooo!

Ultra: Yes!

Luigi: Nuuuuu!

Ultra: Go wake your mother, tell her what happened!

Luigi: No, I'm not lying!!

Ultra: You so are! I'll grab the quote!

"_It appeared to be a Fortress near a town of petals. Me 'n' Tor- Er, d'oh... Torque and I guessed it was around Petalburg." - **Luigi**_

Luigi: Er...

Ultra: There! You might as well be Liar X. Aggerate!

Luigi: I made a mistake there, OK? The real place was Koopa Bros. Fortress! See, we asked around Toad Town and we gathered the info that it was the Koopa Bros. Fortress.

Ultra: Fine... OK then...

Luigi: Hoo, OK... As I was saying... We went back off to the Pleasant Path, east of Toad Town and eventually arrived at the Koopa Bros. Fortress. Torque and I were sure we could handle whatever could happen, so we headed right in.

The enemies there were pretty tough. They were all skeletonized versions of various Koopas. Dry Buzzy Beetles, Dry Bones, Dry _Para_Bones, you name it. We even saw a Skelpion! Y'know, a living skeleton of a Scorpion? Well, we had to fight all sorts of skelto enemies. It was real difficult. They kept throwing out more bones and making new enemies join the battles. Er, but I didn't get any Game Overs, really!

Torque: Yeah, we didn't get any Game Overs on the "basic" enemies.

Luigi: Yeah! Oh, and there were lots of traps, too. Fake ? Boxes, trap floors, even the occasional trap door that slammed you if you touched its knob. Yeah, it was pretty rough. But after all of the traps, we managed to through to the end. Oh, but it doesn't end there, even though I just called it the end! No, there was a quiz master door at the final door!

Yeah, it was a door, with a face on it. Pretty simple, yea? It asked us quiz questions, though. The door was nice enough to let us choose the difficulty level. We chose, uh, the one that ranged through all Mario Games. But man, it asked some pretty good ones, like, "What was the end boss of Spooktastic World?" And, "What was Admiral Bobbery's 'last request'?" Really, Bro., it was hard.

But, uhm, we passed the quiz, though, yeah.

Torque: We did fail, once.

Luigi: Er... Yeah, we did, and we had to go all the way back to the start of the fortress, traps reset and everything! But on the second try, we got passed and met the monster guarding the Rhythm Star, Woodwind Star. It was... Bone Dragon! It was a... Skeletal Dragon. The name should be enough. Oh, but it did have multiple heads, though. Yeah, that's pretty important.

Anyway, we had to defeat it to get the Woodwind Star it was hiding! Apparently, its weak point was its head. So, we attacked its head to accumulate massive damage to it. It wasn't as hard as Bonetail, but it was still a hard battle. After we won, it crumpled up to pieces and dissolved into the air.

I grabbed the Woodwind Star, and held it high in the air. All the Woodwind instruments were returned to the background music! Yay!

Well, that's pretty much it for Part.... Something, A Boney Adventure. And. That's. It. No more stories for now. Next, Torque and I are taking a little breather here. You can continue on with what you were doing, Bro.

Mario: Oh? Uhm, yeah, nice, uh, sleepin' to you. See ya!

Mario pokes Spiky Joe in the eye to wake him up, then Mario's gang jump on the next boat to Chocolate Island and are off to rescue the next Colour Star: Yellow!

END

* * *

Brainstorming sure does help a plot, huh? ^_^ Well, a good number of EarthBound references here.

I also referenced a certain... person I'd rather not mention. I'll just leave it at: CWC

Don't try to figure it out, though, you really don't wanna know. _Really_.


	23. Chapter 23: Not So Chocolaty Ride

_**Episode 23**_

Another boat ride for our heroes, but this time, the ride was free!

Spiky Joe: What? Oh, uh, yay, free boat rides are fun?

Mario: Yes indeed! No need for my coins to get wasted on something needed to save the world!

The boat ride was going all swell and dandy until...

Koopinator: _! _Something's amiss here. Gonzales, stay on your guard.

Mario: But we didn't even enter the mysterious fog yet.

Spiky Joe: Er, w-what?

A thick fog suddenly covers the boat, causing the boat to stop in the water.

Ultra: Man, l can't see anything in this soup!

Mario: But, l didn't have any corn!

Koopinator: We must have drifted close to a haunted island or something.

Spiky Joe: Haunted lsland?!

Mario: Hm, it's a piece of land surrounded by water that is inhabited by ghosts and poltergeists and other such phenomena.

Spiky Joe: What?!

Mario: Hm, l can't make it any simpler than that.

Spiky Joe: No, l mean, you used some really long words there! I'm surprised you even know how to say them!

Mario: Well of course I know how to say such words. It is only rudimentary that a living being knows the correct terms of the English language.

Spiky Joe: Er, what? Did he have a brain fart or something?

Ultra: I think he's possessed.

Mario: Possessed? Why, l most certainly would not be! I mean, this Mario fella speaks such basic language, does he not?

Spiky Joe: Possessed.

Ultra: OK, where's the Tiny Li'l Ghost who's in charge?

Mario: Oh, so you aren't a couple of numskulls then?

Spiky Joe: Oh yeah? Well... I can't think of a witty line, so we'll just knock the ghost outta Mario!

Koopinator: Taking a beating doesn't release a poltergeist.

Spiky Joe: Er....

Ultra: What made you think beating Mario would work?

Spiky Joe: Uh... "Leap before you think?"

Mario: Ha! It is laughable that you have no real strategy or any Exorcism Slips with you!

Koopinator: I have some back at the castle...

Mario: Wee hee!

Spiky Joe jumps on Mario with his Spike Top, causing 5 damage to Mario.

Mario: 25/30 HP

Mario: Ah, yow! That ain't cool! I'm not allowed to mess with your heads?!

Ultra: What?

Mario: Geez, I was just Joshing you two.

Koopinator: So, while you were messing with our heads, the boat was left drifting towards that island then?

Mario: What? No, the boat driver jumped off the boat and swam away, leaving the boat to the current... which could mean that we're slowly heading towards that brown island over there.

Spiky Joe: Huh? It looks like the island shown on our map!

Mario: The nonsense! We are searching for the Chocolate Island! The one with a brown mountain... on...it......... Oh, l get it, heh hee!

Ultra: So, what's with this fog then?

Koopinator: Perhaps it got haunted over the years.

Mario: Oh, hm... Looks like we're getting close to its shores. At this rate, we only-

Mario stops as the boat bumps into something and stops moving completely.

Mario: Oops, we hit a sandbar.

Spiky Joe: Oh great, now we're supposed to swim the rest of the way? With all those Chomp Sharks in the water?!

Mario: We walk the sandbar, duh.

Ultra: Hm, the fog makes it hard to see. We'll have to be careful where we walk.

Mario and his friends jump out of the boat and onto the sandbar. They slowly walk on the mushy sand and encounter a few water-type enemies. After enough walking, they reach the shores of the island and look around for any signs of the Colour Star.

Spiky Joe: No suspicious activity here. Well, aside from that ominous house with the steam coming out of it.

Mario: Hm, yeah, it looks so normal here. Aside from the fog.

Ultra: Er... You don't think the fog is...

Mario: Nope.

Koopinator: Ahem, the fog is coming from that house, we can see.

Mario: Huh? Oh, yep, I knew that!

Mario and the team walk to the small, brown house with the fog coming out of the vents on the side. Mario opens the door, revealing an empty, foggy, and echoing room with stairs leading to the basement.

Spiky Joe: Is it really OK to open someone's door without knocking at least?

Mario: Of course! I do it all the time! Especially since we're on a mission. And on that note, our current objective is finding the source of the fog. By using these round balls called, "Eyes," I can locate the source of this pea soup fog!

Mario uses his eyes and sees that the fog is coming from the staircase leading to the basement. Mario points his finger towards the stairs and walks down them. The basement is foggy, yet dark. A loud whirring noise is coming from a square, white box shaking back and forth. There is a Yellow dotted Toad turning dials on the white box.

Mario: Oh, hello! What is this machine you're working over?

The Toad could not hear Mario over the loud whirring of the machine.

Mario: MACHINE YOU'RE WORKING ON TOAD?!

The Toad jumps and notices Mario and his fiends.

Toad: What? Oh, sorry, I didn't notice you! My name's Mellon!

Ultra: What's this machine doing? Why's it so foggy?!

Mellon turns off the white box and it slowly stops whirring and the fog stops pouring out of its back.

Mellon: That's how it vents its heat.

Mario: Your plan to cover the world with fog is very elaborate!

Mellon: Er, what?

Mario: Oh yes, but l found you out! You won't be getting away with it!

Mellon: Oh... It's a crime to do laundry?

Mario: Buuut, if you hand over the Yellow Colour Star, I'll let you cover a few continents.

Mellon: Huh? How do you know of the Yellow Colour Star?!

Mario: Aha! You fell for my tarp! I was just pieing words together! But the real question is... Why do _you_ know of the Star?

Mellon gives off an evil glare...

Mellon: I was appointed by Ashi Boke to protect it from a chubby guy named Mario. You look like a chubster to me, so you better just beat it!

Mario: But... I'm not fat... That Boke guy looked more fat...

Mellon: True, but... Uhm... In comparison, you're a stick.

Spiky Joe: Heh, it's true! XD

Mellon: Stop distracting me! Are you gonna leave and stop bothering me? Or shall l show you what it's like underwater?

Mario: I've already been underwater before. It wasn't all that bad.

Mellon: OK, fine, Mr. Smart Jumper, we'll just battle it out here!

TO BE CONTINUED


	24. Chapter 24: Vs Mellon

_**Episode 24**_

Mario: 23/30 HP - 15/15 FP

Spiky Joe: 15/15 HP

Mellon: 70/70

Mario/Jump/Normal Bounce/ Mario bounces on Mellon! 2 damage!

Spiky Joe/Attack/Shell Toss/ Spiky Joe gets in his shell and tosses himself towards Mellon! 2 damage!

Mellon/Attack/ Mellon headbutts Mario! Mario guards to receive 2 damage!

Mario: 21/30 HP - 15/15 FP

Spiky Joe: 15/15 HP

Mellon: 66/70 HP

Mario/Hammer/Normal Hammer/ Mario swings at Mellon! 2 damage!

Spiky Joe/Attack/Spike Bomb/ Spiky Joe jumps on Mellon with his Spike Top! 5 damage!

Mellon: Hm... Hey, do you know you wanna know what my signature move is?

Mario: Not really...

Mellon: Er... Uh, OK......

Melon/Attack/ Mellon headbutts Mario! Mario guards by putting Spiky Joe in the way! Mellon hits his Spike Top and takes 1 damage.

Mellon: Ah, hey, you can't guard like that!

Mario: 21/30 HP - 12/15 FP

Spiky Joe: 15/15 HP

Mellon: 58/70 HP

Mario/Jump/Power Jump/ Mario uses FP to increase attack power! Mellon receives 4 damage!

Spiky Joe/Attack/Spiky Bomb/ Spiky Joe uses another Spiky Bomb! 5 damage!

Mellon: OK, _now_ do you wanna see my signature move?

Mario: Nah, I'm good.

Mellon: Grr.... Forget it, I'll show you anyway!

Mario: Aw, but I said no... :'(

Mellon: OK, fine, I won't.

Mellon/Attack/ Mellon slides under Mario's feet! Mario takes 2 damage!

Mario: 19/30 HP - 8/15 FP

Spiky Joe: 15/15 HP

Mellon: 49/70 HP

Mario/Jump/Power Bounce/ Mario uses more FP to jump on Mellon many times! 7 damage!

Spiky Joe/Attack/Spiky Bomb/ Spiky Joe continues his Spike Bomb spamming. 5 damage!

Mellon: OK, _please_ let me show you my signature moves!

Mario: I don't wanna!

Mellon: Graa, I'll do it anyway!

Mario: And make me sad? :'(

Mellon: .....Yes!

Mario: :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

Mellon: I'm ignoring you.

Mellon/Attack/ Mellon takes out.... MELONS!

Mellon: Yep, I use Melons as my Special Attacks! Whattya think of that?

Mario: :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(

Mellon: .....How 'bout this?!

Mellon throws a Melon at Spiky Joe! The Melon gets stuck on his Spike Top, making his Spiky attacks useless!

Mellon: No more Spike Bomb spamming for you, Buzzy!

Spiky Joe: :'( :'( :'( :'(

Mellon: Oh come on, not you too...

Mario: 19/30 HP - 2/15 FP

Spiky Joe: 15/15 HP

Mellon: 37/70 HP

Mario lets Spiky Joe go first!

Spiky Joe/Items/Maple Syrup/ Spiky Joe takes the Maple Syrup out and Mario drinks it. Mario regains 10 FP!

Mario/Hammer/Power Smash/ Mario uses his new FP to smash Mellon! 4 damage!

Mellon/Attack/ Mellon smashes Mario with a melon! 4 damage! Mario drinks some of the splattered juice on him to revive 2 HP!

Mario: 17/30 HP - 11/15 FP

Spiky Joe: 15/15 HP

Mellon: 33/70 HP

Mario/Hammer/Power Smash/ Mario pours more smash onto Mellon! Mellon guards by holding a melon in front of him! The melon splatters all over Mario and Mellon! They both suck up the juices to revive 2 HP each.

Spiky Joe/Attack/Spike Bomb/ Spiky Joe, still with a melon on his Spike Top, tries to go for another hard attack! The melon pops as it makes contact and Spiky Joe manages to hit Mellon! 5 damage! Mellon and Spiky Joe suck up the juices to revive 2 HP each!

Mellon/Tactics/ Mellon takes out a melon... and eats it! He regains 10 HP.

Mario: 19/30 HP - 8/15 FP

Spiky Joe: 15/15 HP

Mellon: 42/70 HP

Mario: Augh, this'll take forever!

Mario/Cheat/God Mod/PK Rockin' Omega/ Mario tried PK Rockin' Omega! 612 damage to Mellon!

Mario Won!

* * *

Mellon: Aw, ow, you cheater...

Spiky Joe: Are you gonna God Mod every fight, Mustache?

Mario: Hey, be happy I don't use it right away!

Mellon: OK, you beat me, but... The Colour Star's up on the roof. And there's no ladder. Nor is there a staircase. You can get it yourself... Oh... l'm losing control over the kid's body! I would've been a great purple adviser....

Mellon plops onto the floor and a transparent, yellow ghostie floats out and towards the roof. It hits its head on the roof and falls down, under the floor, to the Underwhere.

Mario: Well, he's Queen Jaydes' problem now. I bet he'll live a life of never-ending boredom and dullness, just like the other Shaydes... Or put to work for being bad... Heh, have fun cleanin' the River Twygs! :D

Mellon: OoOooh....

Mario: Ah! The ghost is persistent!

Mellon: What? Who are you?

Koopinator: Wait. The kid was just possessed. He seems to be coming to.

Mellon: Possessed? So, all that wasn't a dream?

Mario: No, Super Mario's hurting in some key spots, so I don't think this is a dream.

Mellon: Well, thanks for saving me... But l'm not a kid....

Mario: Well, you couldn't save yourself so, bleh!

Mellon: Well.... blah!

Mario: Bloh!

Mellon: Bluh!

Mario: Blih?

Mellon: Dernit, there are no more vowels.... Er, yeah, I'm OK... Just a little spooked, is all.

Spiky Joe: So, you know how to get up on the roof? We need the Colour Star up there.

Mellon: Yeah, you can get up there with a big Spring Jump. You can do that, right?

Mario: Uh, no... I don't even have the boots for the Spin Jump.

Mellon: That smarts... Guess you'll have to backtrack over here when you do? Well, when you can, you'll have to use it right at that X on the floor and grab the pipe above there, in the attic.

Mario: Okeydokey! Now, on to our next dilemma. Ultra? Why do you keep staring at my hammer?

Ultra: 'Cause I want it.

Mario: You'll get it after I get the Ultra Hammer.

Ultra: But then I'll want the Ultra Hammer!

Mario: =P

Ultra: :'(

Mario: Think of it this way: You'll have TWO hammers when I get the... Wait, you already have INFINITE hammers, forget that!

Ultra: :'( :'( :'( :'(

Spiky Joe: So, how do you suppose we get off this island?

Mario: Simple, we push the boat back into the water and jump onto it and I can't drive a boat.

Koopinator: I... didn't think "boat driving" would be something I'd need in the future...

Spiky Joe: It'd be really hard for me to drive a boat... Small...

Ultra: I, uh, wanna have your hammer before I drive a boat.

Mellon: I saw some Sailor-looking Toad run off further into the island.

Mario: What?!

Mellon: Yeah, uh, I'm not sure if I was dreaming or not, but it sure looked clear and I remember it well. Try searching the island. Nothing to lose... *CoughExceptafewLifeShroomscough*

Spiky Joe: What'd you just cough?

Mario: Off into the island then!

Mario and co. run out of Mellon's house and headed further into the island. What? Did you think this chapter was gonna end this short?

END


	25. Chapter 25: Green is Not Yellow!

_**Episode 25**_

Mario: Oohh....

Spiky Joe: Geez, it's about time you woke up!

Mario is laying down on the couch in Mellon's den, feeling very dizzy.

Mario: I was...sleeping?

Ultra: For awhile now. We got in a fight with a whole lot of baddies and you got hurt and collapsed. We carried you back here and decided to leave you in Mellon's care. We went on to find the Green Colour Star.

Mario: ...and did you?

Spiky Joe: Of course not! Ouromov stole the GoldenEye!

Mario: I don't think that's how you spell it.

Spiky Joe: What am I, Russian?

Koopinator: What are you guys talking about? *sigh* Of course we found the Green Colour Star. It won't activate until you take hold of it...

Mario: Mm hmm.... OK!

Mario gets off the couch and grabs the Green Colour Star from the Koopinator's hands. The colour of Green is restored to the world!

Spiky Joe: We also found... These Super Boots!

Spiky Joe handed over the Super Boots! Mario's jump attacks' offense went up by 1 and he can now do the Spin Jump!

Mario: Hey! I can get up to the attic now, right?

Mellon: No, you need the Spring Jump for that.

Mario: Awwww!

Spiky Joe: It's OK, Mustache. We did find the sailor Toad dude. He's out on the ship, waiting for us.

Mario: Alright... But..... Ultra?

Ultra: Yessums?

Mario: Where is my Super Hammer?

Ultra: ......I.....dunno......

Mario: Ultra... Hand it over...

Ultra reluctantly hands over the Super Hammer back to Mario...

Mario: Now we open up our map and check the next location we need to go to!

Mario takes out the Magical Map and checks it carefully. The next location is another castle, but it is surrounded by four bandana-covered Koopas, and a town with Koopas.

Mario: Petalberg... Hopefully not the one in that Pokémon game...

Spiky Joe: Sweet, let's go!

Mario: Hey, wait... I just noticed... all my partners are Koopas....

Spiky Joe: That's a little bit out of left field but, I'm not Koopa. I'm a Buzzy Beetle with a spiked red shell.

Mario: Still a Koopa.

Mellon: I'd love to help out, but I'm supposed to be a background character until the final battle when every- Oops, can't say. Spoilers.

Mario shakes his head and walks out of Mellon's house, out to the boat waiting for them. They are ferried to Rogueport and, once there, make their way to Petalberg.

Mario: I'm walking, lalala...

Ultra: Mario, aren't Bandana-covered Koopas near Koopa Village?

Mario: _AAAAAUUUUUUUUGHGHGHGHH!!!!!!_

Mario and his team go all the way back to the boat and are ferried to Toad Town, then they go down the Pleasant Path and down the path to... the Koopa Bros. Fortress.

Spiky Joe: Isn't this where Luigi went?

Mario: Yeah, and this is where we are going to.

Ultra: I hope we can find the Ultra Hammer soon.

Mario: …........

The party continues down the path and eventually reach the castle itself. The front door of the castle is guarded by two Dry Bones.

Mario: Don't worry... This will be easy as long as we look like a couple of Jazzy Runaways! Heh, follow my lead...

Mario grooves out to the tunes in his head and boogie-woogies past the two Dry Bones and into the castle.

Mario: Nothin' to it, right? Uh.... Guys?

Spiky Joe, Ultra, and Koopinator come through the door casually...

Mario: I said to be a Jazzy Runaway!

Spiky Joe: That ain't easy for someone like me.... Four legs....

Ultra: It seems juggling hammers doesn't count as Jazz.

Koopinator: I refuse to minimize my already low self-respect.

Mario sighs as he turns toward the inner guards of the castle and thinks of how short the chapter was...

END


End file.
